I can never get used to these 4am church meet ups. Tebza always looks at me like she wants me to stay longer and my kids are usually fast asleep. I don’t get the chance to wish them a good morning or ask them how they slept. Fortunately, my initiation into the church wasn’t as long as the average person. Being Khotso’s and Ona’s best friend and a brother to Shak has worked to my advantage tremendously. So as of tomorrow, after six crazy months, I’ll be able to have breakfast with my family before work.
I’m honestly wanting to have a conversation with Tebza about possibly taking over as CEO in my businesses. Now that I’m a deacon, I have the work cut out for me. I will help her here and there when I can, but I trust her out of anyone else to take my business to the next level and not try to steal it from me.

We buried my father two weeks ago when we came back from KZN for Fifi’s wedding. I can’t believe that my mother would let my dad get away with something like that. When Fifi told me what happened, I just imagine if it were Ruri that went through that and I regretted ever not knowing what happened because I would’ve made him pay for this a long time ago. What’s wrong with that man? Then he always behaved as if he just didn’t want Fifi around because she was an issue in his marriage with my mom. He was the issue. He was the sick bastard who had a serious issue and it’s sickening that my mom thought it would be a good idea to keep bringing Fifi into that house.

“Seete”, I hear someone say. It’s Shak. I wasn’t expecting him to be here. And morena is with him.
I look at them.
“Are you good?” He asks me.
“Ja, I’m fine. How’s Fifi?” He knows what I’m asking.
“She’s dealt with it. Don’t let it eat you up like this. We have work to do.” He says.
I nod my head.
Ona is now greeting me with a fist pump and a “sho”. Khotso is behind him and does the same. Then it’s Zithulele. What’s going on? They are all here so early.

“Gentlemen, it’s good to be back. Thank you for allowing me my leave”, Shak says. He got married for one day. No one understands why he needed two weeks to fuck his wife in KZN when he could’ve done it here.
“But I’m back now. And we’ve got work to do. Shit has died down since Dise’s shit and I think we can come up for air now after a long period of lying low.”
True.
“But, I have to ask. Is there anyone here today who has a wife that doesn’t know that he’s part of this church?”
Morena is staring at us, piercing through us.
Only a few hands go up.
I don’t know what to make of Shak’s facial expression.
Then he says, “Those of you whose wives understand that you are criminals and are part of the church, are there any of you fucking around?”
No hands go up.
“If there’s one thing we’ve all learned here is that these women take cheating personally and if they come for you, they come for all of us. They come for this organization and that’s when we all have a problem. So, next time you want to bust a nut, use your hand or bust in your wife. But the shit that has happened is unacceptable and we are not going through that again just because you busted in the wrong slut.”
Silence.
“Ona, you exposed us, son.” Shak says.
Ona acknowledges and apologises.
“Those of you who said your wives or girlfriends don’t know, I need to investigate that. I don’t completely believe that a woman thinks you do honest work when you work odd hours and make shit loads of money. I refuse to believe it. And if your wife can lie to you or keep it from you that she knows what’s going on, that woman is dangerous. I won’t have it.”
I look at these men who put their hands up and I can already see the regret on their faces. Lol. I think they just snitched on their wives.
“Now, moving on to business. It is my understanding that Kabila is in Tholoana Kingdom.”
Everyone tenses up.
Who is Kabila?
“He was seen at my wedding and he has been spotted a few times around here. We all know that’s dangerous. He didn’t inform anyone that he was coming here and if he doesn’t need our help for whatever he has come here to do, it means that he has come here for us. We don’t know when he’s going to strike, but we have to be prepared. In the meantime, we strike him.” Shak says.
“We have some members around the world who have intervened in some ways and I can tell you now, keep your kids away from schools for now and keep your wives in areas that they are not easy targets. It’s about to get ugly.” Morena says.
“I support pope on this one. To get us where they need us to be, they’ll come for what makes us the most vulnerable.” Shak.
“Bishop. Pope. A minute, please”, Zithulele says.
“Phone your wives and organise for your kids to leave school immediately. Come back in ten minutes”, morena says.
The gents leave except for morena, Shak, Ona, Khotso, Zithulele and I.

“Letlali managed to track Kabila down.” Zithulele says.
“Phone her”, pope says.
Zithulele dials her number.
“Hey babe. Can I call you back? I’m helping Fifi with something”, Tlali says as she answers her phone.
“Letlali, this is important.” Pope says.
“Okay.” Tlali.
“Where’s Kabila?” Pope asks.
Tlali sighs then says, “I found that he is working with two people who are in the church. I’ve sent the names to Zithulele. One is in Tholoana Kingdom and another is in South Africa. They are being assisted by –
She pauses.
“By who? You are doing well, ndodakazi.” Shak says.
“By mofomahadi’s sister, Kgosikgadi.”
Morena and the twins don’t even look shocked. They are just pissed off.
“As it stands, he is in Tholoana Kingdom. He is now at mofomahadi’s parents’ house. Fifi and I placed an unidentifiable tracker on his car.”
“YOU DID WHAT?!” Shak, Zithulele and I yell. Are they crazy?
“They didn’t see us. But now we have real time data of their movements at all times.” She says.
“Where are you?!” Shak.
“We are almost home.” She says.
“Where’s Refiloe?” Shak.
“Tell him I’m sleeping”, we hear Fifi say.
“I heard that. Have you lost your mind?!” Shak says.
“Fifi, fetch Luhle and go to our house.” I say.
“Lulu briefed us. They have gone to fetch the kids already.” Tlali says.
“Now you go there too and stop being a staring!” Shak.
She hangs up.

“Maboko, I’m sorry we couldn’t throw you a promotion party, but your job as a deacon has officially started.” Shak says.
I nod my head.
“Khotso and Maboko, you need to find anyone who is close to these members who are helping Kabila. Squeeze them for information. Unless they are dying from their hearts stopping because of shock and pain, they better be talking.” Shak says.
We nod our heads.
“Ona. Qwabe. Find those two motherfuckers. Bring them to me at mofomahadi’s parents’ home. Pope and I will go there now and wait. Qwabe, get Letlali to give us access to track Kabila’s movements.”
We all nod our heads.
By the time the others come back, we are picking those we are taking with us. They do the hard labour. We call out the instructions. It’s on!

…

Legoa and I walk into Kenzo’s house. Well, we break into it, but we just choose to say that we walked into it. Kenzo is the church member who has been working with Kabila and Kgosikgadi – my mam’holo – to do whatever it is that they are doing.
The lights are out, but there is moaning coming from the bedroom.
Legoa and I look at each other. We actually laugh. This bastard is probably having sex for the last time in his life.

We make our way up his staircase and follow the noises. The door to his main bedroom is slightly open so we just push it open and walk in. At least his kids are not here. Good for him. Legoa turns on the light and the wife jumps off him while screaming. He looks at us and he already knows what time it is.
“Your wife is nice”, I say.
“Baby, go get dressed and start heading to the kids”, Kenzo says.
“Nope. Baby can get dressed right here because she’s coming with us.” Legoa says.
“Please leave my wife out of this. She’s not part of the church.” Kenzo says.
“But she’s the one who was having lunch with Kabila’s wife not too long ago to discuss next steps on your operations – whatever those may be.” Legoa says.
Letlali is incredibly resourceful. She’s always known how to find information and I’d be lying if I said we as a church are not grateful for her. She tends to be on the crazy side of life, but she loves Zithulele. Anything that’s important to him is important to her. She’s a real one. There isn’t a lot of us that can say we know what that’s like. But I think I’m getting close with Thabi.

We are pulling Kenzo and his wife to our car when I get a text message from Maboko telling me that they have the friends and the other guy too. They were having a boys’ night out when they found them. I guess we will be meeting up at my grandmother’s house.
I’m driving. Legoa is sitting with the wife in the backseat and Kenzo is with me in the front seat. We cannot put them together because you never know what people will cook up and come up with just to save their lives. We have a team of men with us, but right now, we don’t trust too many people with much. Anyone can be bribed. We don’t know what Kabila has put on the table to turn a whole priest?! Imagine the people beneath him.

I see Thabi calling me.
I don’t want to be distracted. I’ll call her back. Kenzo looks at my phone vibrating.
“What are you looking at?” I snap at him.
“You not going to get that?” He says.
“No.” Me.
“You might want to”, he says.
What is this idiot on about?
I give my phone to Legoa. I ask him to check what Thabi needs.
“Thabi”.
…
“We are a bit busy. Can this wait?”
…
“What?”
…
“Where is everyone right now?”
…
“Okay. I’ll call you back.”

He hangs up.

Legoa puts a bullet in Kenzo’s wife’s knee. She screams.
“What the FUCK?!” Kenzo loses his shit.
“Phone Kgosikgadi”, Legoa says.
“Ey –
“VOETSEK WENA MAHN! PHONE KGOSIKGADI NOW OR I PUT A FUCKEN BULLET IN YOUR WIFE’S HEAD AFTER MAKING ONA STOP FOR SOME HOMELESS PERSON TO FUCK HER IN FRONT OF YOUR EYES!” Legoa isn’t playing. Now I’m worried about what’s happening. But I can’t show it.
Kenzo starts crying.
“Ona, stop the car.” Legoa says.
“OKAY OKAY OKAY! PLEASE! PLEASE!” Kenzo says.
I stop the car anyway.
“Phone Kgosikgadi!” Legoa yells.
Kenzo starts dialling a number. His wife is hysterical. She’s in pain.
“I’m sure I don’t need to tell you what to ask her and say to her”, Legoa.
He nods his head.
“Kenzo”, my aunt Kgadi answers her phone.
“You have to take the kids back”, Kenzo says.
Kids?! Kids?! Who’s kids?!
“I can’t. They are fine. They are all watching TV and eating snacks. I need leverage to make sure that Mohato doesn’t kill Kabila. You know what will happen if Kabila dies. And that lunatic that my sister married and the lunatics she gave birth to will not have the foresight that we do.”
“Kgadi, you have to let the kids go. Please!”
She’s quiet.
“They’ve got you, don’t they?” She says.
I point a gun at his wife.
“No. They’ve got my wife. They’ll come for my kids. They know I’m involved. What I don’t understand is why they didn’t just take me.” Kenzo.
“Damn it!” Kgadi says.
“Give them their kids. Please. Take those kids to wherever they need to be and just drop them off. This is only about the diamonds and the drugs. It doesn’t have to be about dead bodies.” Kenzo.
“I’ll call you back”, she says then hangs up.
“Kenzo! You don’t think I know that you fuck that woman? Make sure she does what is required. I’ve already suffered enough because of you. If I die or my kids die because of you and that woman, don’t bother burying me because I’ll never rest in peace and that will all be because of you.” The wife says.
“I’m so sorry, my love.” Kenzo says, crying like a little bitch.
“Don’t be sorry. I don’t care for your sorry. Save my life. Save our children’s lives. Give us a second chance to live and don’t make us pay for the shit that you do. Phone that woman back and tell her what she needs to do so I can have my life back and so my kids don’t have to grow up without a mother.” She says.
“But love –
Legoa jumps out of the car and calls one of the homeless people towards the car.
Kenzo wants to get out of the car and possibly kill Legoa but his door is locked.
“Don’t do this!”
“Kenzo, you are going to let these men rape me?” The wife is crying! She is wailing.
“Ona –
“Listen to your wife.” I say.
“They have not forgiven pope for the attack that he made on them.” Kenzo blurts out.
“That attack happened over a year ago.” I say.
“While they are not over it. It cost them a lot of money, and diamonds were stolen from that operation.” Kenzo.
“They came into our kingdom to perform illegal activities without our authorisation. What did that shit think would happen?”
“He wants his diamonds and he wants money. He has come here to rob our reserve bank and rob the royal house and church headquarters. Kgosikgadi gave him the information that he needs. My role is to keep him informed of what’s happening in the church, so they attack while we are on another mission.”
I signal to Legoa that we should go.
We make our way straight to my grandparents’ house.

…

Ona and Legoa arrive with Kenzo and his wife. His wife has been shot in the knee so she has to limp into the house. My grandmother, my uncle Kamo, my aunt Thuto and my aunt Kgosikgadi are here. Lefa (the other guy involved) and their friends are here. Morena and my mom are also here. Kenzo and his wife are thrown to the floor by Ona and Legoa. Bishop walks in behind them.
Kabila is also here. On the floor.

“What do you want from me? Isn’t this the life that you all demanded I should live? You dragged me from Johannesburg on my graduation day and married me off kicking and screaming. You killed the father of my children and dragged me back into this life. Now, you want to kill my husband and my kids?” My mom is angry and hurt at the same time. It actually pains me to see her this way.
“Don’t talk to mom like that”, Uncle Kamo says.
“I will talk to this woman however I see fit. You won’t even talk to your mother. Where do you get off telling me how to speak to mine?” My mom has never disrespected uncle Kamo before. She’s really turned up today.
“Kea, you are speaking to me like this?” Kamo cannot believe it.
“Yes! Because you fail to tell this same mother to just leave me the fuck alone. I left your life, Maphodile. I never bothered you after you made it very clear to me that love wouldn’t be at the centre of our relationship. Now you’ve chosen hate instead?”
Silence.
“Kgosikgadi, you’ve brought foreign criminals into my country. Are you aware of the sanction that I can impose on you for that?” My mom.
Silence.
“Mohato, give me the gun.” My mom says, extending her hand towards morena.
I do not recommend putting a gun in her hands in this state.
“Kearabetsoe!” My grandmother tries.
“MOHATO! SHAKA! GUN!”
Morena and bishop are extremely conflicted. But you know what, I support what she’s trying to do. So I give her a gun.
“Thank you”, she says.
She takes a step towards Kabila.
She shoots his shoulder and we are all taken aback as Kabila screams.
“What do you want in my country?” My mom asks Kabila.
Kgosikgadi is sweating bullets from fear.
“Your husband stole from me.” Kabila arrogantly says before he fights the pain again.
“Stole from you?! You bring illegal shit into my country to push crime and corruption and when you are dismantled from doing that, you claim we stole from you? Would you like to try again at giving me an answer that will not corner me to kill you?”
He just breathes heavily and is in pain.
My mom shoots his other shoulder.
Yerrr!
“KABILA! WHY ARE YOU IN MY FUCKEN COUNTRY?” My mom is yelling now.
“He’s my guest”, Kgosikgadi says.
My mom looks at her.
She walks towards Kgadi.
She shoots Kgadi’s left breast.
Yoh!
“Wena na, the sacrificial lamb for a corrupt criminal who is an illegal immigrant in my country. Why is this man in my country?” My mom is quite….
Kgosikgadi is still screaming.
“Kearabetsoe –
“WHAT?!”
My grandmother gets blocked.
“How did you think this would end? That I’d still be the same girl you shoved into this life after I begged you not to? That I’d let you destroy my husband’s hard work in this kingdom? Yes, there was a time when I wanted nothing to do with this man and you were all key contributors to the hatred that I felt for him. But then I got to know him and love him… now, I’m the queen who protects her king and I’m the lioness that protects her cubs. You’ve come for the wrong people. And wena Kabila, you’ve messed around in the wrong country!”
Then my mom walks back to Kabila. She uses her gun to raise his head. He’s crying.
“I was prepared to let my husband kill you for just coming into this country and thinking you can behave unruly. He’s a much kinder version of me and I thought, what the hell? He’s just a naughty boy that coloured outside of the lines. Death is punishment enough. And my husband, he lets you go… fast and almost painless. I’m not such a bad person, right?”
This is very frightening. I’ve never seen my mom like this. Even morena is traumatized. Proud, but traumatized.
“But…”
My mom slides the gun down to Kabila’s penis.
Is she really going to shoot off his balls?
“You came for my grandchildren. You and Kgosikgadi actually thought it would be a good idea to come for my grandchildren? Khabane, Banathi, Mohale, Mnqobi, Ruri, Tholoana and Lefatselabarena… my babies. You put your hands on them. Do you have children and grandchildren, Kabila?”
He’s just crying. He also knows his balls are about to be blown off.
“When I got the call that my grandchildren were taken by you and Kgadi, I felt like someone ripped my womb out of my body and left it out to bled. Almost like –
My mom blasts his balls off.
Literally every man inside of here holds their balls. She’s ended this man. There’s no man left in here.
She then moves to Kgadi –
“Khotso, take that gun away from –
The gun goes off and Kgadi’s stomach is shot. I guess her womb has been blasted open.

Now my mom gives me my gun back and says…
“Kabila, phone someone to fetch you, Kgadi, Maphodile, Kamo and Thuto. They are all banished from here and you are not welcome here. You can bleed all the way back to your country. If I even sniff you or any of these people I’ve told you to leave my country with around here ever again, your mother, your wife and your kids will be fed to lions – literally. You’ll pray to the lions to have mercy on its meat.”
What a beast!
“Love”, my mom.
“Yes, my love?” Morena.
“I want them out of our country in thirty minutes. Can you make your wife happy?” What is wrong with my mother today?
“Your wish is the command of the kingdom, our queen”. Morena says then kisses her.
Now, my mom walks out of the house.
Jesus Christ!

…

We are on our way to our wives and kids. We are all quite traumatized about how switched the queen was. It is silent in here. Morena and bishop are in a Fortuner driving in front of us and behind their guards. We have guards behind us as well.

“CRASH!”
The Fortuner has three cars bashing into it. Then, people come out of cars and start shooting at the Fortuner.
What the fuck?!

Maboko and I are the first to climb out of the windows of this Fortuner we are in. Ona and Khotso come out too, but emotion has overwhelmed them. We are running and shooting every single person we see. The guards are also shooting shit up in here and when the bloodbath and dead bodies have scattered on the road, we breathe and look around to see if all four of us are still standing. We are all still standing.
I run to the one side of the car with Maboko. The twins go to the other side.
The ambulance and police are already here as well.
They manage to pull out Mashimane. He looks bad.
“Mashimane! Awukwazi! What are we supposed to say to Fifi? Awukwazi, Mashimane! Awukwazi!” I keep saying as I run next to the stretcher with him lying on it.
“I’ll climb with him”, I say to Maboko.
“Okay. I’ll call Fifi.” He says.
I get into the ambulance with him.
I see mofomahadi get out the car and she’s screaming, “Mohato! MOHATO! NO! MOHATO!”
Someone puts a foil sheet over his body. I just hang my head. The ambulance leaves as mofomahadi refuses to get help because she wants morena to wake up.

We are at the hospital now. Tebza is on the phone managing the PR on the death of the king. The entire kingdom is officially in mourning. No business is running. The white flag is up at the government offices and at the royal house. Mofomahadi has been sedated. She’s terribly injured, but she didn’t want to be helped. Khotso and Ona have not said anything all evening. Their eyes are blood red. They are hurt. They are angry.
Teboho walks in with Mohale elders and some old white men we’ve never seen before. We all look at them.
Some elder goes up to Ona. Then he says, “Morena. All hail King Onaleruna Mohale.”
The women ululate!
Mofomahadi walks in. She was fetched from her ward. She’s still crying. She’s in a gown from the ward.
“We know you are hurting, but it must be done.” Some elder says.
Mofomahadi sits on an empty chair next to Ona.
“Mme mofomahadi! All hail the queen of queens – queen mother Kearabetsoe Mohale.” The elder says.
There is ululating again.
I only realise now that nurses and doctors are also here paying their respects. They are bowing down and ululating too.
Thabi is asked to sit on the other side of Ona.
“All hail our queen of Tholoana Kingdom – mofomahadi Rethabile Mohale.”
The ululating happens again.
“The family asks for space.” The elder says.
We all leave the Mohales in there and stand outside.

Letlali finds me and she holds me tightly. I hold her tightly too. I cannot believe that the king is dead. The night is still. Everything is dark. All you see when you look up – just under the blanket of the stars – are white flags raised on high buildings.
Maboko and Tebza are also cuddled into each other. Teboho is actually crying and Maboko is consoling her. I don’t think she’s crying about morena being dead. I think this night has just been heavy. It feels like it’s a death of an old era and we are about to see a new beginning that we’ve all been anticipating all this time.

My phone rings.
As I pull it out of my pocket, I realise that my screen is cracked. I cannot even see who is calling.
“Hello?” I answer my phone.
“Zithulele, it’s Refiloe. Shaka is awake.”
I take a deep breath of relief. I actually release a tear. Letlali hugs me, soothing me.
“Hello?”
“I’m still here, Sis’Fifi.”
“Okay. He asked me to call you and Maboko to his ward. Khotso and Ona are here.” She says.
“Okay. Siyeza.” I say.
I hang up.
“Maboko”, me.
“Sho.”
“Shak is awake. He is asking for us.”
“Okay”.
We both walk in, but we make Tebza and Letlali walk in front of us.

The waiting room has Mohale elders and all the kids. Thabi and Lulu have helped mofomahadi back to her ward. Tlali and Teboho sit here with the kids. I think they understand that something has happened. They know that grandpa is gone. They are sad. But they are kids. They are asking questions no one can answer and now more than ever, I want to be with my kids and just hold them.

I walk into the ward and bishop is crying. He must have heard what happened to morena. Ona and Khotso are a mess too. Surely whatever needs to happen here can happen another time. We don’t have to have it all figured out today. We can mourn today. We can cry. We can have some space. We will figure out everything else in the morning.
Ona walks up to bishop. Bishop pulls Ona’s head in towards his and Ona becomes vulnerable.
“Morena, we need you to lead us. You know you can trust us, son.” Bishop says.
“Pope, we need you to lead us. You know you can trust us, father.” Ona says.
Shit!
There’s that.
Pope now raises his head. He looks at all four of us. He then says, “A bishop is the most trusted man by a pope. That’s why there’s not many of them around. It’s people a pope knows he can trust no matter where they are in the world. All of you – my four sons… I take you on as my bishops. Your salaries will increase – yes. Your protection will increase – yes. Your influence will increase – yes. Your responsibility will increase – yes. But above it all, you are all now my sons. And the five of us, together with the church, we are unleashing a fucken civil war in Kabila’s country.” The pope orders.
“For morena”, Khotso says.
“For morena”, Ona says.
“For morena”, Maboko.
“For morena”, I say.
“For the best pope and the best king I’ve ever had the pleasure of serving under. We not leaving that country alone until every breath that breathes in there sleeps with the pain we are carrying in our hearts right now. Even tourists will mourn or die. Makunyiwe amacala!”