We are halfway to the end of our story, and we want to celebrate with you. 

Thank you for keeping your eyes and imagination committed to this blog. I write for your entertainment and I can only hope that I do not disappoint. 

I was once asked why I love writing so much content. My truth is that I believe that with more local and/or relatable content, South Africans will read. These blogs have proven that. Most posts average 25 – 30 pages of content. And when I give you +/- 15 pages of content, I have had people InMail me and tell me that the episode felt short. I’m getting people reading; therefore, my goal is achieved. If I could, I’d print out 1000 copies of my novels and go to places where people cannot access my content on the internet of Facebook and just hand out the books. I still believe that reading is important because it shapes so much more than you can imagine. We have qualified people in the workplace who cannot put together grammatically correct emails. As a content producer in writing, you can imagine my frustration and sometimes my temptation to correct the emails. Then when I hear that South Africans cannot read or write, I just get irate. In my research to understand why this is the general consensus, I learned that there is just not enough of us producing content for the average South African to read and enjoy… and just keep on reading. So, I produced that. I don’t write for profit; I write for passion and to simply keep you entertained through literature. I make the content available on my platforms and I leave it up to you to access it and enjoy it. I thank you for consuming my content. If you would like to read more of my content (i.e. novels) you are welcome to access them on my website under library on www.k-pable-c.co.za

Many of you have engaged me on your feelings and reactions on the In Too Deep episodes and it has honestly been amazing to read how each story resonates with you – it kept me committed to writing each day no matter how tired I was. To say thank you, you can definitely look forward to bonus content this weekend – both Saturday and Sunday. We are celebrating ten weeks of In Too Deep the K-Pable-C way. Keep inviting your friends on our journey. 

Let’s continue to make our reading circle bigger! 

For as long as you read, I will continue to write, 

K.

…

“Here”, I give him a bag. The bag is full of memory sticks. 

“More information?” He asks me. He is feeding our new-born son, Mnqobi.

“You’ve brought us back to this fucken hell hole without a plan to make sure that they don’t do you dirty again. They’ve proven who they are and they’ve proven who they look out for – THEMSELVES. You need to make sure that you are valuable enough to never be taken for granted ever again. I have to live with the fact that they are going to use you for as long as you live. The least that you can do for our sons and for me is to make sure that you are the “family” that they keep saying you are, but fail to protect.” 

He looks at me as if I have lost my mind. 

“Letlali, I know that you don’t want to be here – 

“Why are you saying that like it matters? If it mattered, we wouldn’t be back here. But it’s fine, you’ve made it very clear that it’s not up to me and what I want doesn’t matter when it comes to the church. But I hope that our children matter to you, at least. You owe them your survival. Every time you are on those streets implementing the orders you’ve taken from those ruthless animals; you better remember that dying is not an option. You owe Banathi and Mnqobi the courtesy to survive and you will make sure that those animals you work for give a fuck about you enough to make sure that you survive.” 

He seems hurt. I can’t even feel sorry for him. Imagine how I feel and he couldn’t care less. He just dragged me and my children back to this place because the Mohale twins and Regodise just showed up at our house in Lakefield and told us to. 

“Take these with you and get yourself into that government. This will be proof that they can trust us. We hang on to the hard drive. I really hope that you have learned how important insurance is”, I say. “When did you get so strategic?” He asks me. 

“I got smart. I hate losing”. I answer him. 

He stands up, gives me Mnqobi and kisses me. 

“I will stay with the kids. You go out there and have a good one. Most importantly, go out there and stop losing. You owe us your survival. Always remember that. You are no longer just living for yourself. You have a wife and two babies that need you. We came here with you. You better make sure that you come back home to us at the end of each business day”.

“Letlali, baby –

“I’m done having this conversation with you.” I say and head back upstairs to sleep with my child. Nathi is still asleep, so I have to put just one person down. It is 6am anyway. 

…

My husband has been out all day and I’ve been left to finish up decorating and furnishing the house while I look after my two kids. Thankfully, they are both peacefully sleeping – it’s their midday nap time. When you have two under two, structure and routine is very important for your own sanity. Zithulele wanted us to get a nanny and I understand why he felt the need for us to possibly look into getting one, but I’m not really feeling it at the moment. Too much has happened and right now, I don’t trust anyone in Tholoana Kingdom, including the Mohales. They left my husband and his sister to suffer in prison and did nothing to get them out. When he got out, only then did they reach out, then had the audacity to have him come back to Tholoana Kingdom and be a criminal again. 

We had to come back here to this place, leaving Nothile and Zama back in Lakefield with the house, so he could fulfil his duties to the flippen church and I just have to be a supportive wife next to him with two babies. I’m really not happy at the moment. The smallest things set me off. My kids are honestly my peace – as chaotic as managing both of them can be. I try to be Zee’s peace as well because I understand his position and I understand that he needs me by his side now more than ever. He just also sets me off sometimes. I don’t understand his blind loyalty and at times, it feels as if he chooses the church over our safety. He has two kids! TWO! Even if I’m not the one he cares about, why doesn’t he at least fight for his children? There are times where I ask myself why Zee chose me. What about me stood out for him and told him that I wanted to live this life of ducking and diving instead of being at peace with a simple life that is just better than growing up in a shack with a drunk father? I honestly wonder. 

The guys finish up putting my furniture where I instructed them to put it around the house and have put up my decor photographs and ornaments around the house. They finally leave and I decide to prepare some food for Zithulele. He promised to come home and have lunch with us. As I am in the kitchen fixing a good meal for us, the gate phones me and tells me that Regodise Mohale is at the gate. I buzz her in. 

I prepare some juice as well as water with slices of lemon. I prepare glasses for Dise and I to drink from.

She finally walks into the house as the door is already open. She looks very beautiful. She’s always been a very beautiful woman. And I’ll always say this: I’m glad Ona married her and not Thato. 

“Hey girl”, she greets me.

“Hey babe”, I say as I lead her to the sitting room with a tray of juice, water and tumbler glasses. 

We sit down as we engage in our small talks. I pour us some juice after asking her what she would prefer. Finally, she tells me why she is really here. 

“We were working on getting Zithulele and Nothile out of prison.” She says. 

I look at her – annoyed actually. 

“Tlali, it was a very difficult situation. Even Khotso got out illegally. We just – “Dise, why are you here?” I ask her because I really don’t understand the point and purpose of this conversation. 

“I want you to know that we never abandoned Zithulele. We value him – we value you and the boys. I don’t want us to not have a good vibe between us because of all of this.” 

I chuckle and shake my head in disbelief. 

“Regodise, I almost gave birth alone and on the run. My husband almost missed out on the birth of his own son. They handed him three life sentences, Regodise. Three life sentences. Okay fine, you couldn’t help him get out. What about Banathi and I? I was heavily pregnant with an eighteen-month-old and you knew that I didn’t have anyone. You couldn’t even look after Zithulele’s family while he was on the inside. What exactly did you do to show loyalty to him? The same loyalty that you expect him to show you?” 

She’s quiet. She looks at me and she genuinely doesn’t know what to say.

“Regodise, you and your family demanded that we come back to Tholoana Kingdom, so that my husband can keep on doing all of this dirty work for you. We came back. We were prepared to move on with our lives and never think about any of the things that you’ve put us through as a family – in a different country even. You didn’t let that happen and my husband respected that, so I was forced to respect that too. But I will ask that we please stay within our limits. It’s very clear to me that we are not friends. And it’s fine. We don’t have to be friends. My husband is your employee and we will respect each other and interact with each other within that capacity. I just ask that the line remains uncrossed between us.” 

“I’m really sorry that you feel that way, Letlali. It was never our intention to make you feel this way. I hope that one day, we will revisit this conversation and you’ll feel differently about us.” 

“I doubt it. But I’m prepared to maintain the professional relationship between us because of my husband’s role in your family’s business.” 

She looks very sad and I honestly couldn’t care less. 

Mnqobi cries and I just know that he has probably woken up Banathi as well. The baby monitor is next to Dise and I, so we both hear my boys wake up. 

“Please excuse me. I need to attend to my kids. Plus, my husband will be back for lunch, so I’m busy preparing for that as well”, I say. 

She nods her head and heads outside to her car. 

I head to the bedroom to calm my children down. 

Banathi is such an interesting child. He is quite analytical and a bit more responsible. I’m not sure if it’s the big brother thing kicking in or what, but he has a certain care about him that I love. Then he also has this weird aggression he displays when things don’t go his way. It’s an aggression that I’ve seen in Zithulele when he doesn’t get his way with things. I have been through the most with Banathi. I will always have a soft spot for him in the depths of my soul. We survived so much together and here we are, still standing. Mnqobi, as small as he is, is a bit of a bully. He’s established that we all jump when he threatens to cry. So, when things don’t go his way, he has that threat to cry thing. He’s already super manipulative. 

I sit on top of the bed and get Mnqobi. I feed him my boob. Nathi looks at me. He gives Mnqobi his space to be a baby. Then when Mnqobi is settled on my boob, I hand him his bottle of water to drink. He knows that he will have his food as soon as his water is done. When he drinks his water, he sits on top of me, just to feel close to me, I suppose.

Zithulele stands at the door of the house. I don’t see him until Banathi says, “Baba”. 

Zithulele smiles at us then walks into the bedroom and sits with us on the bed. He takes Banathi and gives him attention, letting him sit on him while he drinks his water. Mnqobi stretches out his hand – mouth still on the boob. He just wants to wrap his finger around his dad’s finger. Zithulele likes to troll him and pretend as if he doesn’t see him. Now he’s pulling that face that tells us he is about to cry.

“Zee, please pay your son some attention”, I say. 

He laughs. 

Then this little freak bites my nipple with his toothless gums. 

“Ow!” I scream and take him off my boob.

Now he’s crying. 

“What’s wrong, baby?” 

“He bit my nipple!” 

“Mnqobi, you are going to annoy me now. This is my wife!” 

“Sorry, mommy”, my sweet Banathi says to me.

“Thank you, nana.” I say to Banathi.

Now Mnqobi is screaming. I give him to Zee and I take the sweeter baby to give my attention to. Zee manages to calm Mnqobi down and gives him a bottle of his breast milk pumped out.” 

“How was your day, baby?” He asks me now that we have both kids calm and attended to.

“Busy. I was split between being a mom, being a wife and being a home executive.” I say.

“You know that I appreciate you, right?” He says to me, looking at me sincerely. 

“I know, love.” I say. 

“I probably wouldn’t still be alive if it weren’t for you. I love you, Tlali. I live for you – you and our boys. You guys are my life. You give me purpose. You give me a reason to want to wake up and do whatever it takes to make sure that you are safe and that you are happy. I’ll never stop trying to make sure that you guys are good.” He says. 

I smile at him. He smiles at me.

“And you know I’m here to take care of you too, right?” I say. 

He laughs and says, “We have two little people who run our lives to prove it.” 

I laugh aloud. 

“Anyway, lunch is ready, baby.” I say.

“And these two?” 

“We’ll put them on their feeding chairs and keep them busy. Nathi has to eat anyway, he only had water while his brother was eating from my boob.” 

“Okay love.”

We make our way downstairs with babies in hand. Such is my life. Zee is finally getting his wish of me being a stay-at-home mother. 

Regodise is still here? Oh hell! With Ona as well? I’m already rolling my eyes and Dise notices it immediately. 

“Hey guys. I didn’t know that you were joining us for lunch”, Zee says to them. He’s clearly happy to see them. Ona greets Zee with a joke, but honestly, I’m not interested. Dise is observing my every move. Ona looks at me as well and this time, Zee looks at me too.

“Is everything okay?” Zee enquires. 

“We need to talk, Legoa”. Ona says. He is staring at me. 

“I’ll be upstairs with the kids”, I say. 

“All of us need to talk”, Ona says looking straight at me. Dise is still staring at me. 

I get my kids settled into playpens to keep them occupied. Banathi is kind of over me now because he still hasn’t eaten. I use this as an opportunity to waste time. I get his food from the kitchen and I start feeding him. Ona looks very concerned. Dise looks hurt. 

I just sit down, Nathi sits on top of me, and I feed my child. Mnqobi is making a noise and I’m just playing around with him, making both him and Nathi laugh. Zee is just awkward. This takes me about thirty minutes. Then I finally settle them in their playpens. 

…

Tlali did not want to come back to Tholoana Kingdom and she has made it absolutely no secret. When we had to leave Lakefield, she was extremely angry. I’ve been trying to make her happy about this move since it happened, but she’s just not budging. Some days she’s fine and cooperative, some days she just wakes up angry and you’ll never know how the day is going to end. 

I let her choose the house she wants, the car she wants and let her decorate this house as she sees fit. She’s still not happy. I can’t leave the church. The only way to leave the church is in a coffin. I don’t know what else to do to make her see that if I had a choice, I wouldn’t be here. 

Now, Ona and Dise sit before us in our house. Tlali’s pissed as hell and the Mohales haven’t even started speaking. 

“Letlali and you, Legoa, we profusely apologise for how things turned out. We profusely apologise that we couldn’t pull through for you on time and we came across as if we were going to leave you in there to serve the three life sentences. That was never going to happen. At least tell me that you believe that”, Ona says. I really don’t understand why we are having this conversation. 

Letlali is really pissed off. It can’t still be because of Mnqobi biting her nipple. 

“I really don’t understand why we are having this conversation”, I say.

I don’t like the way that this couple is looking at my wife. I’m ready to ask them why they are looking at her like that, but the look that she is giving them is just as hectic. 

I scratch my head. 

“Letlali, I’m sorry that we didn’t look after you and Banathi while Zithulele was inside”, Regodise says. 

“Regodise, I thought you and I had this conversation. Why am I still listening to you speak about this?”. 

When did Letlali and Regodise have this conversation? 

“Because I don’t want you to feel as if we don’t care about you guys. We really do. We have no excuse for treating you the way that we did and we are so sorry.” 

Tlali just takes a deep breath. 

“Mama!” Banathi yells. 

We all look at them. They are still playing. So, we continue…

“I still believe that we should keep things professional between us. My husband is your employee and that’s where it should end.” 

I knew that Tlali was against us coming back here. I didn’t know she felt so hectically about the Mohales.

“But Letlali, you guys are not just employees to us. You are family”. Dise says. 

Letlali actually laughs. 

This entire situation is uncomfortable. 

“Family? This is how you treat your family?” Tlali.

“We were also on the run, Letlali. We were dodging bullets and arrests and also had to leave the country for some time. It was difficult for all of us. We were not just sitting somewhere and watching everything pan out.” Ona says. 

“But you managed to get Khotso – your actual family – out of prison and leave behind my husband – your supposed family. Then you don’t even wait three days before you phone him and ask him to come back here. You wait until our son is two months then you drag him back here. That’s how you treat your family?” 

“Morena needed him back.” Ona says.

“What was morena going to do if I didn’t drive from one country to another – heavily pregnant – to get my husband out? If morena needed him so much, he could have got him out of prison himself, right?” 

Now there is absolute silence. I do think that this is the time for me to say something.

“Baby –

“Zithulele, don’t touch me. Just leave me alone.” 

“But babe, I just want you to know that –

“You want me to know what, Zithulele? What? That you put these people and this system before our own family? I told you to leave this damn church. I begged you to start over without all of this nonsense. But they come first, right? And no matter what happens to you out there, I must find a way to just deal with it and always remain prepared to raise our children on my own.” 

Yho! I don’t think Letlali was ready to have this conversation today. 

“My mother died because of all this nonsense. I couldn’t even bury her. My siblings are still in hiding because of all this nonsense. Then the three of you come here and think you can tell me how I need to understand your positions and instruct me on how I should feel and how I should view things?”

We are all silent now. 

“I’m here, aren’t I? I don’t want to be here, but I’m here. I don’t want my husband to be here showing loyalty to the same people who view him as replaceable, but he’s here doing exactly that. So, what more do you want from me? Can you just leave me in peace and go about your lives the way that you’ve always done. I’ll deal with whatever happens because really, what else am I going to do?”

With this she stands up from the couch, takes our kids – putting Mnqobi in her one arm and holding Banathi’s hand with her other free hand. They walk to some room that is right here downstairs. Had she gone upstairs, it would take forever to do so because Banathi is a bit slow up the stairs. And you can just tell that she just wanted to get the hell out of here. 

Now, it’s just Dise, Ona and me. They are now both looking at me. 

“I don’t think that this was the right time to have this conversation. She’s still very upset about a lot of things – especially about coming here.” I tell them. 

“Do you believe us when we tell you that we really didn’t mean for this to happen?” Ona asks me. 

“I don’t think about it. I just do what I need to do.” I say. 

Ona rubs his hands together and tenses his face. Why is this so important to them? They could honestly just move on with life. That’s what we are trying to do.

“I can get her siblings back here and have them settled within two days.” Regodise. 

“You know, Dise, I know you are trying to be nice. But at this point, I don’t know how she will receive anything that we do to try and make this better for her. I think we need to give her some space and when she needs something or when she is ready to talk about what’s infuriating her so much, she will come to us.” I say. 

“Legoa, you can’t leave the church” Ona says. 

“I understand. She knows it too; she just doesn’t understand. But give her time. I’ll work on her.” 

“I understand her and I understand where she is coming from. We were wrong, Ona. Our entire family was wrong for leaving Zithulele inside to a point where she had to make a plan while she, herself, was on the run heavily pregnant and with another baby in hand. If that were me, what were you going to do? How were you going to feel? Look at how traumatized we all are for what happened with Oluremi and Mohale and that’s not even half of what Letlali went through.” Regodise says. 

“I don’t know how to fix this”, Ona says out of frustration. 

“Some things you don’t fix, babe. We just apologise until we are forgiven. It’s not our place to put a timeline to her forgiving us or trusting us again. We just keep proving how sorry we are until she believes us.” 

I never expected this from Dise at all. 

…

The Mohales gave me the day off today. After yesterday, they figured that I needed some time with Letlali to get through whatever it is that we are going through. 

I woke up very early in the morning to try and make breakfast for her. I have Nothile on the line and I’m asking her to talk me through making an omelette. She’s doing a bad job because this omelette doesn’t look like what Tlali produces when she says she’s making omelettes. 

“Thule, why don’t you just make simple eggs and bacon? Put some bread in the toaster and there, you have your breakfast.” She says.

“I want to make an omelette for my wife, Nothile. Now please make sure that I produce something decent at least. I’ll just put leaves on it at the end to make it look fancy.” 

Nothile is in stitches. Then I look up and I see Tlali dying of laughter as well as she stands at the door. I smile at her. Well, at least I achieved something. I made her laugh. The omelette was meant to do that.

“Hai, yekela. My kitchen is a mess nje. Bye.” I say then I hang up as Nothile is still laughing. 

“Why are you laughing at me?” I ask Tlali as I try to keep this thing going a little longer to keep the smile on her face. 

“What have you done to the kitchen?” She asks, still laughing. 

“I was trying to make you an omelette.” I tell her. 

She walks up to me, still laughing, then she hugs me and says, “Thank you, my love.” 

I just hug her as well. I love her so much. I place no one above her. Absolutely no one.

“This was just my way of saying that I’m really sorry, baby. I’m so sorry. I know how difficult this is for you. I’m thankful you’ve come with me regardless of what has happened. I appreciate you so much, Letlali Khuzwayo. And I love you, baby. I place no one above you.” 

She nods her head, while still in the hug, then she says, “I know”. 

We look at each other. 

“I just need time, Zee. There’s a lot that I’m dealing with. Being back here has forced me to face demons that I’d hoped I’d have some time before I started facing them. I don’t need the Mohales here giving me excuses about why they treated you the way that they did, and I don’t need you defending them because it infuriates me. You shouldn’t expect me to be okay with anyone who treats you the way that they have treated you. You are my husband. I’ll lose my mind when it comes to you and our sons. You need to understand that.” 

I find it very sexy how protective she is of me. My sons – I understand, they are her children. But me? I don’t understand it, but I absolutely love it. 

“So, I should always come and tell on people to you? Will you spank them on my behalf?” I seductively say as I undo the buttons of the t-shirt that she is wearing. She smiles and says, “no one messes with my husband. No one. I’ll make them live to regret it.” 

I actually believe her. Letlali has a dangerous streak about her and it concerns me that she’s so good at hiding it. I just thank my ancestors for such a strong woman to hold my household down. 

I bend her over the kitchen counter and I thrust her from behind. I haven’t been able to touch her since I came out of prison. She had Mnqobi and wanted nothing to do with sex since. My hand has been working overtime and at this point, I’m letting it all out inside of her. To even prove that I’ve been deprived – add the months that I spent behind bars because I was not going to fuck another man – I come explosively, but very quickly as well. 

My cum us dripping down her legs, so she runs to the guest restroom to clean herself up. She comes back and I’m already hard again. 

She takes me to the couch and she just lets me have her. 

My wife and I have exotic sex, but still make love to each other. She is worth it. I’m glad that even when she wants nothing to do with sex, I don’t cheat on her. She’s worth the starvation and she’s worth the respect that I give to her. We just make love for over an hour in our TV room… on couches, the coffee table, the carpet, the floor, on the window…

Then my kids wake up and we have to be parents again. 

“I’ll go attend to them”, I offer. 

“Thank God I got my injection. We would have probably made a third one right now.” She says and I laugh. I’m very glad that she got that injection too. Very glad.

Tlali did not want to come back to Tholoana Kingdom and she has made it absolutely no secret. When we had to leave Lakefield, she was extremely angry. I’ve been trying to make her happy about this move since it happened, but she’s just not budging. Some days she’s fine and cooperative, some days she just wakes up angry and you’ll never know how the day is going to end. 

I let her choose the house she wants, the car she wants and let her decorate this house as she sees fit. She’s still not happy. I can’t leave the church. The only way to leave the church is in a coffin. I don’t know what else to do to make her see that if I had a choice, I wouldn’t be here. 

Now, Ona and Dise sit before us in our house. Tlali’s pissed as hell and the Mohales haven’t even started speaking. 

“Letlali and you, Legoa, we profusely apologise for how things turned out. We profusely apologise that we couldn’t pull through for you on time and we came across as if we were going to leave you in there to serve the three life sentences. That was never going to happen. At least tell me that you believe that”, Ona says. I really don’t understand why we are having this conversation. 

Letlali is really pissed off. It can’t still be because of Mnqobi biting her nipple. 

“I really don’t understand why we are having this conversation”, I say.

I don’t like the way that this couple is looking at my wife. I’m ready to ask them why they are looking at her like that, but the look that she is giving them is just as hectic. 

I scratch my head. 

“Letlali, I’m sorry that we didn’t look after you and Banathi while Zithulele was inside”, Regodise says. 

“Regodise, I thought you and I had this conversation. Why am I still listening to you speak about this?”. 

When did Letlali and Regodise have this conversation? 

“Because I don’t want you to feel as if we don’t care about you guys. We really do. We have no excuse for treating you the way that we did and we are so sorry.” 

Tlali just takes a deep breath. 

“Mama!” Banathi yells. 

We all look at them. They are still playing. So, we continue…

“I still believe that we should keep things professional between us. My husband is your employee and that’s where it should end.” 

I knew that Tlali was against us coming back here. I didn’t know she felt so hectically about the Mohales.

“But Letlali, you guys are not just employees to us. You are family”. Dise says. 

Letlali actually laughs. 

This entire situation is uncomfortable. 

“Family? This is how you treat your family?” Tlali.

“We were also on the run, Letlali. We were dodging bullets and arrests and also had to leave the country for some time. It was difficult for all of us. We were not just sitting somewhere and watching everything pan out.” Ona says. 

“But you managed to get Khotso – your actual family – out of prison and leave behind my husband – your supposed family. Then you don’t even wait three days before you phone him and ask him to come back here. You wait until our son is two months then you drag him back here. That’s how you treat your family?” 

“Morena needed him back.” Ona says.

“What was morena going to do if I didn’t drive from one country to another – heavily pregnant – to get my husband out? If morena needed him so much, he could have got him out of prison himself, right?” 

Now there is absolute silence. I do think that this is the time for me to say something.

“Baby –

“Zithulele, don’t touch me. Just leave me alone.” 

“But babe, I just want you to know that –

“You want me to know what, Zithulele? What? That you put these people and this system before our own family? I told you to leave this damn church. I begged you to start over without all of this nonsense. But they come first, right? And no matter what happens to you out there, I must find a way to just deal with it and always remain prepared to raise our children on my own.” 

Yho! I don’t think Letlali was ready to have this conversation today. 

“My mother died because of all this nonsense. I couldn’t even bury her. My siblings are still in hiding because of all this nonsense. Then the three of you come here and think you can tell me how I need to understand your positions and instruct me on how I should feel and how I should view things?”

We are all silent now. 

“I’m here, aren’t I? I don’t want to be here, but I’m here. I don’t want my husband to be here showing loyalty to the same people who view him as replaceable, but he’s here doing exactly that. So, what more do you want from me? Can you just leave me in peace and go about your lives the way that you’ve always done. I’ll deal with whatever happens because really, what else am I going to do?”

With this she stands up from the couch, takes our kids – putting Mnqobi in her one arm and holding Banathi’s hand with her other free hand. They walk to some room that is right here downstairs. Had she gone upstairs, it would take forever to do so because Banathi is a bit slow up the stairs. And you can just tell that she just wanted to get the hell out of here. 

Now, it’s just Dise, Ona and me. They are now both looking at me. 

“I don’t think that this was the right time to have this conversation. She’s still very upset about a lot of things – especially about coming here.” I tell them. 

“Do you believe us when we tell you that we really didn’t mean for this to happen?” Ona asks me. 

“I don’t think about it. I just do what I need to do.” I say. 

Ona rubs his hands together and tenses his face. Why is this so important to them? They could honestly just move on with life. That’s what we are trying to do.

“I can get her siblings back here and have them settled within two days.” Regodise. 

“You know, Dise, I know you are trying to be nice. But at this point, I don’t know how she will receive anything that we do to try and make this better for her. I think we need to give her some space and when she needs something or when she is ready to talk about what’s infuriating her so much, she will come to us.” I say. 

“Legoa, you can’t leave the church” Ona says. 

“I understand. She knows it too; she just doesn’t understand. But give her time. I’ll work on her.” 

“I understand her and I understand where she is coming from. We were wrong, Ona. Our entire family was wrong for leaving Zithulele inside to a point where she had to make a plan while she, herself, was on the run heavily pregnant and with another baby in hand. If that were me, what were you going to do? How were you going to feel? Look at how traumatized we all are for what happened with Oluremi and Mohale and that’s not even half of what Letlali went through.” Regodise says. 

“I don’t know how to fix this”, Ona says out of frustration. 

“Some things you don’t fix, babe. We just apologise until we are forgiven. It’s not our place to put a timeline to her forgiving us or trusting us again. We just keep proving how sorry we are until she believes us.” 

I never expected this from Dise at all. 

…

The Mohales gave me the day off today. After yesterday, they figured that I needed some time with Letlali to get through whatever it is that we are going through. 

I woke up very early in the morning to try and make breakfast for her. I have Nothile on the line and I’m asking her to talk me through making an omelette. She’s doing a bad job because this omelette doesn’t look like what Tlali produces when she says she’s making omelettes. 

“Thule, why don’t you just make simple eggs and bacon? Put some bread in the toaster and there, you have your breakfast.” She says.

“I want to make an omelette for my wife, Nothile. Now please make sure that I produce something decent at least. I’ll just put leaves on it at the end to make it look fancy.” 

Nothile is in stitches. Then I look up and I see Tlali dying of laughter as well as she stands at the door. I smile at her. Well, at least I achieved something. I made her laugh. The omelette was meant to do that.

“Hai, yekela. My kitchen is a mess nje. Bye.” I say then I hang up as Nothile is still laughing. 

“Why are you laughing at me?” I ask Tlali as I try to keep this thing going a little longer to keep the smile on her face. 

“What have you done to the kitchen?” She asks, still laughing. 

“I was trying to make you an omelette.” I tell her. 

She walks up to me, still laughing, then she hugs me and says, “Thank you, my love.” 

I just hug her as well. I love her so much. I place no one above her. Absolutely no one.

“This was just my way of saying that I’m really sorry, baby. I’m so sorry. I know how difficult this is for you. I’m thankful you’ve come with me regardless of what has happened. I appreciate you so much, Letlali Khuzwayo. And I love you, baby. I place no one above you.” 

She nods her head, while still in the hug, then she says, “I know”. 

We look at each other. 

“I just need time, Zee. There’s a lot that I’m dealing with. Being back here has forced me to face demons that I’d hoped I’d have some time before I started facing them. I don’t need the Mohales here giving me excuses about why they treated you the way that they did, and I don’t need you defending them because it infuriates me. You shouldn’t expect me to be okay with anyone who treats you the way that they have treated you. You are my husband. I’ll lose my mind when it comes to you and our sons. You need to understand that.” 

I find it very sexy how protective she is of me. My sons – I understand, they are her children. But me? I don’t understand it, but I absolutely love it. 

“So, I should always come and tell on people to you? Will you spank them on my behalf?” I seductively say as I undo the buttons of the t-shirt that she is wearing. She smiles and says, “no one messes with my husband. No one. I’ll make them live to regret it.” 

I actually believe her. Letlali has a dangerous streak about her and it concerns me that she’s so good at hiding it. I just thank my ancestors for such a strong woman to hold my household down. 

I bend her over the kitchen counter and I thrust her from behind. I haven’t been able to touch her since I came out of prison. She had Mnqobi and wanted nothing to do with sex since. My hand has been working overtime and at this point, I’m letting it all out inside of her. To even prove that I’ve been deprived – add the months that I spent behind bars because I was not going to fuck another man – I come explosively, but very quickly as well. 

My cum us dripping down her legs, so she runs to the guest restroom to clean herself up. She comes back and I’m already hard again. 

She takes me to the couch and she just lets me have her. 

My wife and I have exotic sex, but still make love to each other. She is worth it. I’m glad that even when she wants nothing to do with sex, I don’t cheat on her. She’s worth the starvation and she’s worth the respect that I give to her. We just make love for over an hour in our TV room… on couches, the coffee table, the carpet, the floor, on the window…

Then my kids wake up and we have to be parents again. 

“I’ll go attend to them”, I offer. 

“Thank God I got my injection. We would have probably made a third one right now.” She says and I laugh. I’m very glad that she got that injection too. Very glad.