I asked Thabang to come with me today. We have come to talk to Mahali. I feel it is necessary, especially because I don’t know what kind of conversations about me have taken place between Mahali and Mmakabelo. Then I remembered that me being with Thabang is her biggest trigger. So I asked Thabang’s mother to come with us. She is a specialised customary lawyer and while we are her family, I’m also trusting her to be fair. That’s what we need to neutralise whatever is going on between Mahali and me. I’m not expecting that everything will be resolved, but I just need us to co-exist hle. 

We are now at Mahali’s home. Her mother has offered us tea and scones. I can’t even swallow the tea or the scones. I’m sitting in the middle of Thabang and his mother.

 Mahali finally enters where we are sitting. I’m a bit nervous. I’m even shaking a bit. I told Thabang to not be affectionate whatsoever today. If I shake, he must leave me alone. If I faint, he must allow someone else to help me. But he must not make things worse by being my husband in front of Mahali. I can see that he wants to hold my hand and calm me down. But he must restrain himself. 
Mahali is staring straight at me. 

The elders break the silence by greeting each other, talking about the weather, exchanging niceties… Mahali and I are staring at each other. Finally, it’s time for me to explain why I am here. 
I clear my throat then begin, “I’m here today to clear the air between Mahali and me. I understand that we got off on the wrong foot, and we may have had multiple misunderstandings that have led to the belief that we cannot co-exist in one family. I’m not expecting us to be friends or to be close after this, but I’m hoping that we could at least work together to fulfil our duties in the Mothipa family.” 
Everyone is still looking at me. Mahali is still staring at me, not even blinking.
I look at Thabang’s mother.  She nods her head at me, signalling that I should go ahead. I face Mahali again, then continue, “Mahali, I’m not here to be anything more than just Thabang’s third wife. I know that in the realm of wives, you and Mmakabelo are above me. And I respect that.”
“Really?!” That’s her first reaction. And it’s not with a nice tone. But at least there is conversation now.
“Yes, really.” Me.
“But you carry yourself like you are Thabang’s only wife.” She says.
“How do I do that?” Me.
She’s quiet.
“Please, tell me. Because if I don’t know where I’m going wrong, I can’t fix my behaviour that offends you so much.” I say.
“First of all… you control Thabang.”
I’m going to try my best to not be defensive. I’m reminding myself that her feelings are valid and if I’m asking, I must be open to hearing her full story.
“You do! How could you have a white wedding with a priest and vows with a polygamous man? Do you know how much of an insult that was?! You insulted Mmakabelo and me… and you showed us that you don’t recognise us in this marriage or this family. It was wrong! And you don’t see that! Then there’s this honeymoon of yours. Mmakabelo and I never got honeymoons. And I understand that it was a gift from your friends, but to us… it seems that even the people in your life don’t understand how it works here. We are all equal. If something happens for one person, it must happen for every one of us and it must happen the same way for each of us.” 
I take a deep breath. 
She takes a deep breath. Then tears roll from her eyes. Then she says, “then wena, Morafe… you have me sent away! Who the hell do you think you are?!”
Now this is where I have to come in because I didn’t have her sent away. 
“Mahali, I had nothing to do that.” I say.
“UMAKA!” She yells. 
“Mahali…” Thabang intervenes. 
She looks at him.
He continues, “you and I were both in that meeting. Your elders were also there. That suggestion came from Mmakabelo. Myself… even mama… we believed that it was a harsh sanction. Ask your elders.”
“So Mmakabelo is the one who just sent me away? That’s what you are saying?” Mahali.
“I’m not sure what her motivation was, but yes… it was her.” Thabang.
“I had nothing to do with it, Mahali. I swear. In fact, I begged Thabang for us to come here today – going over Mmakabelo’s head – to come and fetch you.” I say.
She’s shocked. 
“Mahali, I don’t want us to have issues. Yes, we are married to the same man and I’m aware that I’m not much to you… but we are family. And whether you recognise my kids as your children’s siblings or not, we all have to live together and keep it pushing. I don’t want you out of the picture. I didn’t come here to replace you. I married Thabang because I love him and we make each other happy. While we may seem to have a particular marriage in your eyes, we have our issues too. The only reason that you don’t know about my marriage is because my marriage is my marriage and I treat it that way. So I’m asking you… don’t hold me accountable for the husband that Thabang is supposed to be to you. Hold him accountable for it. But I will apologise for the wedding. I’m learning now that it was uncalled-for towards you and Mmakabelo. For that, I profusely and unreservedly apologise for it. The honeymoon bit, I think you can speak to Thabang about it. He is your husband and if you want one, tell him. I don’t have to be the person who approves it. I’m one of three wives. I’m not the principal wife. If you and I are going to have issues, let it be outside of him. While we have him as a husband in common, it doesn’t mean that our marriages are the same or should be compared. They are different. We are different. And he also views us differently. I don’t hate you, Mahali. And I profusely apologise to you if I ever gave you the impression that I do.”
Now I’m quiet. 
She’s looking at me. I’m not sure if the look is sincere or what. 
“I’d also like to apologise that this had to get to this point before we had this conversation. I’ll be a better husband to you. Maybe all of this is a result of the kind of husband that I’ve been to you, and I’m learning. I’ll do better.” Thabang says. 
Mahali smiles, then says, “Thank you, monna waka. I needed to hear that.”
“Bo Mothipa, thank you for coming here as humbly as you have and showing us that our daughter is something in your family. We didn’t appreciate how she was treated. So we thank you for rectifying that. We are happy for Mahali to return to her marital home.” Her mother says. 
I smile too. 
Mahali is also very happy. 

Now that Mahali’s things are packed, she gets into her car with Thabang. I drive back with my mother-in-law. I guess they need the space to talk and reconnect. My mother-in-law is the one driving. I’m just a bit… I don’t know how to explain how I feel. 
“You did very well. I’m proud of you.” My mother-in-law tells me.
“Mama, am I really in the wrong for loving my husband?” I say. 
I’m actually hurt by this. 
She takes a deep breath then she says, “Nana, one thing you need to understand is that Thabang loves you. He sees you as the love of his life and it’s not often that you get those more than once in life. I know and understand my son very well. He respects his other wives very much. He will always be responsible for them and he will always make sure that they are well taken care of. But moratuwa wahaye ke wena! Mmakabelo and Mahali know that very well. It’s not only in the exceptions that he makes for you. It’s in the way that he looks at you. It’s in the way his face and energy lights up when you are next to him or in the same room with him. I know you are a good woman because another woman would use that to change him completely… even ask him to divorce his other wives. But you… you took him and you both went to apologise to Mahali after realising that more than anything, you have hurt her. She needed what you did today. She was desperate for it. For you to be so selfless that you give this to her as you did, I take my hat off to you. I’m proud of you. My son is in good hands with you.”
I hear her.
“What am I going to do about Mmakabelo? She will really come for blood when she hears that I went above her head and fetched Mahali.”
“Leave Mmakabelo to me. Don’t worry. You just continue being the wife that you are to my son. I appreciate you greatly.” 
Ja neh! 

–

I fetched my kids from school then headed home. My mother-in-law is staying with us tonight. 
I’m cooking while my babies are keeping mama entertained. Meme is helping me cook. She’s writing exams, so she finishes early then comes home. I always tell her to not do chores. She must study then rest. She says that she will go crazy, so she wants to help with some chores around the house. We have two domestic workers, so there’s no cleaning or laundry that needs to be done. 

“How are the exams going?” I ask Meme.
“Stressful. But at least I do virtual lessons with my tutors and I attend all extra classes at school. I won’t disappoint you… not after everything that you’ve done for me.” She says.
“Meme, I don’t want you putting unbelievable pressure on yourself. I know that you work hard. And I know how much of an adjustment this new school has been for you. I don’t want you to crack. I want you to pass, yes… but if you are not successful with these exams, it’s okay. I’ll understand. The important thing is that you don’t give up.” 
She looks at me and is getting emotional.
“I don’t want to disappoint you.” She says.
“I’m already so proud of you, Meme. So proud.” I say, hugging her.
“Mama a re you will kick me out if I fail.” She says.
“Not that I’m encouraging you to not listen to your mother… but please man! I’m not going to do that. My priority is your well-being… this includes your mental health. Don’t murder yourself because of exams. Please.” 
She smiles at me. 
“You’ll be good. You’ll see.” I say.
We hear noise in the TV room. The “papa” tells us that Thabang is here. 
“I thought he was with the crazy one today.” Meme says.
I laugh then say, “I’ll also ask what’s happening.” 
“Ai! I don’t want your problems.” She says.
We laugh aloud. 

“Dumelang”, he greets Meme and I as he enters into the kitchen.
“Hello baby”, I say.
“Dumela Abuti Thabang.” Meme.
“Le jwang?” He asks us, leaning against the wall of the kitchen entrance. 
“We good.” Meme.
He nods his head. He looks at me for a while. I think he needs to talk. 
“I’ll finish up here”, Meme says to me.
I smile at her. 
Then I go to my husband. 
He hugs me. 
We kiss. 
He pulls my hand to our bedroom, up the stairs and straight to our bedroom. 
We get inside the bedroom.
He closes the door.
He locks the door.
He starts getting undressed.
Okay… he needs me. 
I get undressed too.
In no time, we are both naked. 
He sits on a chair.
I climb on top of him. 
I get to work! 

We’ve just finished satisfying each other after a good hour of passionate and enduring sex. 
We are now lying on the bed, my head on his chest. 
“You okay?” I ask him.
“I am now.” He says.
“What’s wrong?”
“I feel like I’m being punished for loving you.” He says.
I sit up. My naked body faces him. I cross my legs. He looks at me. 
“What happened?” I ask him.
“I thought things would be better with Mahali back. The kids have her back and all. But yoh… she really took the bad husband thing to another level. She’s upset about some post on insta-something.” 
“The one Meme posted? If it’s an issue, I can ask her to take it down. This is getting WAY much more airplay than necessary. It’s not that deep.” 
“I don’t want Meme to take it down. I didn’t even know what that is. When Mahali showed it to me, I actually liked it. Those pictures are beautiful.” 
I smile at him.
“We do make a stunning couple, don’t we?” I say.
He holds my hand, smiles at me, then says, “We really do.” 
We have a moment.
“She’s also upset that I don’t have girlfriends anymore. I suspect that she had a conversation with Mmakabelo about this because Mmakabelo raised it as well.” He says.
“Girlfriends? So you not having girlfriends is a bad thing?” Me.
“They think I stopped because you told me to.” 
“Why did you stop?”
“Because I love you. And you already have to share me with two other women… I didn’t want you to have to deal with girlfriends too; especially because I don’t share you with anyone.” 
Now I get emotional. He sees me.
“What’s wrong?” He asks me.
“I just don’t know how I got so lucky.” I say.
He opens his arms to receive me. 
I lie on his chest and we just sit in this position… in silence… for another thirty minutes. 

“Let them go to the Maldives”, I say. My head is still on his chest. 
“Huh?” 
“Our honeymoon… let them go. The two of them and their kids… they can all go together. I’ll speak to Tamia. She will understand.”
“Why?”
“Because… it’s not even about the Maldives, it’s about what it represents. You can even go with them. I’ll be good.” 
“But that’s our honeymoon, Morafe.”
“I have your heart, T. I know I do. They don’t. To them, it’s about all of these things that we do – honeymoon, the wedding… all of that. They think that’s where the unfairness is. I want us to show them that it’s never been like that. We are just being led by our hearts. You’ll always do stuff with them… it’s not –
“No Morafe. I’ll plan a proper family holiday for everyone. I just came back from Cape Town with Mmakabelo and the kids. Mahali is planning a SunCity trip. Why must you sacrifice your holiday or our honeymoon because they are not happy?” 
I’m quiet. 
“Baby… we are going on our honeymoon together. They, you, me and the kids are going on our holiday together… you choose whichever place you want to go to. Then we will all go together as a family. That’s how we do things. It can’t change just because they don’t like that I do it with you!” He says. He even sounds angry.
He kisses my forehead.

…

I’ve had the best afternoon with Morafe. I even had dinner at her place. She made quite the dinner. My mom is still deep in complementing her food. 
Now I’m driving back to Mahali. I promised her a week of uninterrupted days. I told her I was going to meet up with Tumelo. She made me promise her not to see Morafe this week. I made the promise, but I don’t intend to keep it. I’m not going a week without seeing Morafe. The fuck?! 

Speaking of Tumelo…
My dad had to go and apologise for him smashing the princess. I don’t know what’s wrong with that guy. What the hell is he doing with a seventeen year old?! The king wants blood! But for now, he gets Tumelo being in prison. He’s been charged with statutory rape and has been sentenced to three years behind bars. We negotiated, hence the three years. Morena wanted ten years. We had to accept the three years, send the king ten cows, twenty sheep and thirty goats. It was not nice. We are still recovering a bit from that loss. Imagine! But my dad paid it on condition that Tumelo’s safety inside the prison is guaranteed. After a lot of convincing, the king assured us. 

The worst part was having to explain to his wives what had happened. Yoh, they are not happy people. That much, I’ll tell you. So now, I have to look after them until he comes out. I make sure that they are taken care of financially. I don’t touch them though. 
And this is where I appreciate Morafe. Of my wives, she’s the only one who has a job. I had asked her to resign and be a full time housewife like Mmakabelo and Mahali – in the spirit of all wives being equal. But when Tumelo got locked up, she’s the only one who had the sense to keep the job so that she’d help me. Looking after five wives is not cheap. But that’s not the shit that Mmakabelo and Mahali would tell you when they complain about Morafe. 

I arrive at Mahali’s house and park my car. I notice that Mmakabelo’s car is also here. Yoh! Ke tlo nyelwa kajeno. 
I step out of my car and head into the house. 
The kids are going crazy in here – all six of them. 
I greet them. They all give me a brief hi then fuck off. Their mothers say that it’s because I don’t spend time with them so they just don’t know me. They know who I am. They live, sleep, eat and breathe my money. They have ungrateful mothers. They better know who I am. 
I ask them where their mothers are. They point towards the patio. 
I head there. 

They are fighting. This is a bit funny… very funny actually. I stand here and listen to this because I need to understand why and how these two are fighting without Morafe. 
Mahali: “O sile wena, Mmakabelo! You told me that Morafe told Thabang to send me away and Thabang told you to go with it!”
Mmakabelo: “I’ve already apologised! What more do you want from me?! We both know that I’m not the enemy here! Neither are you!” 
Mahali: “So who’s the enemy? Ngwana ole wabathu that came to fetch me so I could be with my family after you made sure that’s not a reality for me?”
Mmakabelo: “Mahali! Stop this! Stop acting like a victim! There’s no time! We both know that we have the same problem here. Thabang o rata Morafe! He doesn’t give a shit about me and you! If Morafe asks him to divorce us, our marriages are over! That’s how much power she has! What more if he finds out about the paternity of our children?!” 
Mahali: “Morafe doesn’t have kids of his semen neither. We are all the same.”
Mmakabelo: “You are missing the point. Thabang is aware that Morafe’s kids are not biologically his and he’s accepted it. He’s accepted them. He loves them. Look at how he is with our kids – that he believes are his – versus the kids he knows for a fact are not his. O rata Morafe! The only thing that is saving us from suspicious questions right now is the fact that Morafe doesn’t want anymore kids. If she changes her mind, Thabang will start wondering why they have sex like rabbits, but no kids are coming from that. And then what?”
There is silence.
I step onto the patio. 
They notice me. 
They look like they’ve just seen a ghost.
“Mothipa!” Mmakabelo says in shock.
“Repeat what you’ve just said.” I say softly, but I’m very angry. I’m hurt. I’m embarrassed. 
They look at each other. 
“So I’ve been looking after kids that are not mine all of this time?” I ask them.
“They are yours. They are just –
I leave mid-sentence. I’m not going to accept anymore lies from these two women. 

I’m speeding through the streets and making my way to my peace – the wife that I love… the wife that was always designed for me. 
I get to her place in less than thirty minutes. I park my car and make my way into the house. I barge into the house.
She and my mom are still up, chatting away. 
I stare at them. 
I didn’t even realise that I’ve been crying. 
Morafe is on her feet. So is my mother. Morafe sprints to me, hugs me… trying to revive me. I fall apart in her arms. The cry I release is loud and aggressive. I hold onto her very tightly. 
“I’m sorry, baby. Whatever it is, I’m so sorry.” She keeps saying to me. 
She holds me in her arms. She lets me fall apart. She is my strength. She is my pillar. She is my essence! 
After an hour, we make our way upstairs and to our bedroom. 
She undresses me. 
She takes me to the insuite bathroom. 
She puts me in the shower. 
She undresses herself. 
We shower together. She cleans me up as I cry. I let her. Then she gets clean.

Now, she’s lotioning me. I’m even feeling a little better. She lets me get into the blankets. She leaves the bedroom after lotioning herself and getting into pyjamas. I’m butt-naked under these sheets. 
She comes back after about twenty minutes. She has two cups of hot chocolate. I laugh. It’s weird how this drink always makes me feel better. She puts marshmallows in it – replacing sugar with them. She smiles at me. 
She gives me a cup. 
She gets into the bed and holds her cup. 
“I love you”, I tell her.
“You know that I love you, right? Probably more than I should”, she says.
We kiss. 
“You want to talk about what happened?” She asks me.
“It turns out that Mmakabelo’s kids and Mahali’s kids are not mine.” I tell her.
She gives me a confused look.
“I found them arguing at Mahali’s house. Kids I’ve raised all this time… that I believed were mine… are not mine.” I say.
Now she’s blown away. 
“All six of them?” She asks me.
“Yeah. All six of them.”
“But, I don’t understand. You married Mahali because she got pregnant. The two of you didn’t start trying for kids after you got married. Or am I the one getting the story wrong?” 
I actually just laugh because the more I think about this, the more I just want to kill them.
“Then who is…?” She doesn’t finish her sentence.
“I just left the house. I’ve got nothing left in me for them. Nothing.” I say.
“You are going to have to find out eventually, baby. Especially with Mmakabelo. She was a chosen wife for you. It’s possible that this is actually a family secret all together.”
“You think I can’t have kids?” I ask her as I’m coming to this realisation.
“I don’t know, baby. Maybe we need to see a doctor and understand.”
She sees how down I am. 
She lays her head on my chest. 
Why didn’t I just marry her? Why?!