Ndalo

I make my way to Nosipho’s room. Her father just phoned me extremely heartbroken about how Nosipho handled him. She was supposed to spend Christmas with him and his family. She came back earlier than expected to us. We were spending Christmas at my mom’s house and we are going to my brother’s house for new years’ eve. We should be headed there now. My boys are ready. But I need to talk to Missy over here. 

After two knocks, I walk in. I find her in her room changing and getting ready for tonight. The boys followed me up here. They find something to keep them busy and they keep busy. 

“Nosipho, buya la, sisi. We need to talk.” I say, sitting on the couch in her room. She sits next to me. She’s already rolling her eyes at me. Lord, give me strength to not moer this child. 

“Nosipho, your father called me. Akekho right. What happened at Christmas?” I begin. 

“Baba and I fought.” 

“About?”

“Baba is controlling, mama. He wants to control everything. And he’s mad about the fact that I live here with you. He’s always made me feel like if I love you then I hate him. I mean, why do I have to choose between the two of you? You are both my parents and what happened between you two has got nothing to do with me. I just got really angry. I told his girlfriend that she’s not my mother. That I look up to my mother. You know what Baba said to me? He said ngifuna ukuba is’febe nje ngonyoko.” 

Wow!

Thabang left this part of it out. I’m not sure how to handle this. 

“So, I told ubaba that I don’t blame you for leaving him. And that I wish Uyanda Mbatha was my dad. And because he’s my dad, I wish I were never born. That’s why I tell everyone that he’s dead.” 

Eish.

I close my eyes and take that in. 

You know, this girl thinks Uyanda was the best thing since sliced bread. I don’t understand what gives her that impression. Just because he was a famous soccer player? Who had money? Her brothers don’t even have a father anymore because he chose amanyala over them. She doesn’t want those kinds of problems. 

But anyway, let me address the matter at hand. 

I’m clearly bad at choosing baby-daddies. 

“Nono, you know you really hurt him, right? Ubekhala when I was talking to him.” I say. 

She’s quiet. 

“Ubaba wakho has his flaws, yes. He and I have our issues, definitely. Kodwa we love you so much. We will always respect each other because of what we share in you… of what we gave each other through you that no one on this planet will ever give us… our first-born baby girl… isponono sethu, Nkosi yami.”

She laughs, blushing. 

“Kakhulu mina ke, because you are my only baby girl. Yeah, you are growing up, getting an attitude and thinking you are too grown for me to beat you up, but you’ll always be my baby girl… engabona ngaye that I can be a mother. Ngaba umama for the first time in my life – ngawe.” 

She’s smiling. 

She’s proud. 

Maybe I’m getting somewhere. 

“You know, I remember the day you were born. I had had such an emotionally challenging pregnancy and when I met you and held you for the first time in my arms, I just knew that everything I had been through was worth it. You came out, crying and just controlling our lives from day one.” 

She giggles. 

“Ubaba wakho wakuthatha from my arms, he rocked you so beautifully and you calmed down in his arms – in a way that you didn’t in mine. He cried. He was so happy. He was so proud. He then told me that he was naming you Lehakoe. Your second name. Obviously, ngingumZulu mina… angiyazi iLehakoe leyo ukuthi yini. So, I asked him what it means and he told me that it means treasure. He said to me, “she is Lehakoe la pelo yaka.” I was in awe. I had never heard a name more beautiful and more fitting of who and what you were to us. To our families. Then our families arrived to meet you. I tell my family that your name is Lehakoe. Your grandmother and your uncles were up in arms. Bathi lutho! Ingane yentombi le. Ingane yethu le. UMntungwa lo. UMbulazi! UMashobane! Akuna Lehakoe nix la! Then your father’s family fought us, telling us that bakuhlawulile. Your uncle, my older brother, wathi nix! Inhlawulo is only an acknowledgement that the child is his. But it does nothing more than that. You don’t get their surname and Lehakoe doesn’t get to be your first name. So, thina oKhumalo named you Nosipho. You were an incredible gift that we didn’t even know we needed at the time. You healed us. You reminded us that God is still God. You were what we needed as we were going through a very hard time.”

I pause. 

She’s looking at me as if I shouldn’t stop. That I should go on. Even Phendu is staring at me. He’s also listening. 

Hlangi is throwing things and playing and not mindful of the conversation. 

“Then after our families left, I told Thabang that Lehakoe will appear second in your birth certificate. I love the name. And you were Lehakoe of my heart too. Your father told me that everyone will know that you are mine. You’ll just step out on the street and people will know that ingane kaNdalo le. Kodwa what will tell people that you are his? Lehakoe was one way for him to make his presence in your identity bold. I promised him that everyone will know that you are Thabang’s Lehakoe. You are his Lehakoe la pelo yaka. I promised him that you would know how much he loves you and what you mean to him. It was very important to him. So Nosi, I know that the things you said to him really broke his heart. The one thing he feared would happen from the day that you were born is happening. And he’s hurting. Flaws and all, Nosi, uThabang loves you. It drives him crazy that you are not next to him all the time. He’s trying to control as much of it as possible. But you are growing every day. I even go into a tailspin trying to keep up with you. But at least I live with you. He doesn’t. So instead of keeping up, he tries to control. And baby, he doesn’t mean to hurt you. He may mean to hurt me, but I’ll deal with Thabang. You don’t have to fight my battles for me. Focus on you and him. Ngiyakucela, baby girl.” 

She takes a deep breath. 

“So, mama, why did you and Nosi’s dad break up?” That’s what Phendu asks me. Phendu, not Nosi. Phendu! 

I giggle a bit. 

I feel cornered. I feel a bit… out of control…

Summoned by my kids even… 

But hey. 

“Was it because of my dad?” Phendu is a dog with a bone.

I take a deep breath. 

“No, Phendu. It wasn’t because of your dad. We just didn’t work out. And it happens. Thabang loved Nosi. A lot. That was his child. But it didn’t automatically translate to him loving me. He promised me that he’d always take care of Nosi. And he did. To the best of his ability. Yes, he didn’t have money like Uyanda, but everything he did have, he made sure Nosi had it too. But he didn’t want me. I was just Nosi’s mother, not the woman he loved.” I explain. 

“So, when did you meet my dad?” Phendulile Mbatha! 

Yoh!

“I met your dad when Nosi was about five years old. I had Nosi when I was young and in school still. So, when she was five, I was in College because I couldn’t afford university, and Nosi was in creche. I’d travel to College every day because I wanted to have Nosi sleeping next to me at the end of each day. One day I went to College and your dad was playing a soccer game on a field that was on our school’s premises. I went to watch the game with my friends and he noticed me. And we met.”

“And then?” Nosi. 

“Hai guys!” 

“Please mommy!” They both say.

“Peeeees mommy!” Hlangi mumbles. The three of us giggle. 

“No! You are still babies. Maybe when you are a little older.” I say. 

They frown. 

“Look, I’ve made some terrible choices in my life. I’ve been irresponsible in my decision-making and people got hurt. Even Thuli. You know, Phendu, that Thuli was with your dad for a long time. And even when you were born, she loved you despite the fact that I hurt her by being with your dad while she was with him.” I say. 

“But why did you do that, mama?” Nosi. 

A tear slips out of my eye.

If I knew that one day I’d have to answer to my kids about the things I did in my past, maybe I would have thought twice about the decisions that I made. Especially with Uyanda.

“I loved Uyanda. A lot. And I really believed that he loved me too. We had all sorts of plans together. We were going to get married. We were going to have babies together. He was going to be the biggest soccer star that the world would know and celebrate. He always said that I’d be at home raising his babies and keeping the house warm. He even said that Nosi is our first baby. Who wouldn’t fall head over heels to words like that? Maybe even hope that he means it. That he’d choose me even though he was with someone else. Then he got selected to be in a big team – the NFR Legends. He was on his way to the big league and truly being the superstar that he asked God to be. I then got pregnant. And when our beautiful and bouncy baby boy was born, Uyanda named you Phendulile. God had answered the first half of our prayers so we knew He would answer the rest.” 

Phendu is now blushing and laughing to himself. 

“Eventually, we did get married. People got hurt in the process, but the wedding did take place. And we had our house. We had Hlangi. Our family was growing, amidst our mistakes. And when he passed, the whole world mourned him. The whole world celebrated his life. God answered his prayers. Uphendulile.” 

My kids are smiling from ear-to-ear. Beaming.

Had I known that telling them about their fathers would make them so happy, I’d have had this talk with them a long time ago. I just thought that talking about their fathers made them sad – especially Phendu. 

“Guys, I’m not perfect. And I probably didn’t have ideal relationships with your fathers. But they loved you. Uyanda is not here anymore, but I can promise you, Phendulile, he loved you. You were EVERYTHING to him. I’m sorry if you felt anything but that. But I can promise you with all my heart that you are impendulo kaUyanda from Umvelinqangi. And Ndalo, I’m sorry your father and I couldn’t work it out for you. But for as long as we exist in this world, we will do what’s best for you. As your mother – all three of you – I’ll do my best for you. I love you guys so much. I’m an imperfect person. But I want my love for you to be the loudest thing about me being your mother.” 

Both my kids dive into my arms and we hug. I even get a bit emotional. This is a bit much for new years’ eve. 

“You are doing great, mommy. We appreciate you.” Nosi says. 

This just does everything for my heart. 

After our mooshy moment, we got into the car and made our way to my brother’s house. He’s hosting us. My mom and younger brother are already there. When we arrive, it’s 23:30. So “happy new year” is happening in thirty minutes. 

I decide to give Thabang a call. He wasn’t okay shame. Nosipho, Phendulile and Hlanganani have disappeared into the house and found their way to their cousins and the kids to my brothers’ friends. I’m outside, leaning against my car that’s kind of parked in the street because the yard is full. 

“Hey Ndalo.” Thabang answers.

“Hey. Lalela, I spoke to Nosipho, okay? We will fix this.”

He takes a deep breath. 

“Thabang, do you think we were supposed to sit her down and just explain to her that we don’t have to be together to be her parents? I think we assume that she understands a lot of things, but she’s a child in all of this and we shouldn’t have those kinds of expectations from her.” 

“Ndalo, there was no reason for you to break up with me. You broke up with me and caused all of this.”

“Thabang, you had two other children with the same woman while you and I were together. Was I really supposed to stay around and be faithful to that?”

“I made a mistake!” 

“Really?!”

He’s quiet. 

“You ruined my life, Thabang. You had me pregnant at fifteen. You had me dealing with infidelity and shit in my teenage years. Uyanda broke up with me because of you! I was pregnant with Phendu and yes, I slipped up. I cheated on him with you. But you just had to brag about it and claim Phendu as your child?” 

“He never left Thuli for you. He was never going to do it.”

“Well, you hooked up with someone else while I was already the mother of your child and you never left her for me neither. Hell, you went on to have two more kids with her after we broke up! Then you cheated and had number five with someone else. I was supposed to stick around for that?” 

He’s quiet.

“Akusena ndaba, Thabang. Truly. Can we just get along and fix whatever is going on between you and our daughter?” Me.

“She doesn’t want me.” 

“She does want you. You just keep making her choose between you and I… and that’s unfair. We are both her parents. Stop imposing your brokenness from your family onto her. She’s not you… and you are not your parents.” 

“Don’t talk about my parents.”

“I’ll talk about them because they traumatized you. They broke you. They made you the man that you are and now you are hurting your own daughter. You are hurting your Lehakoe la pelo yaka.” 

I hear him sniffing. I think he’s crying. 

“We don’t have to be enemies, Thabang. We share one hell of a beautiful gift. Enter the new year kahle. We will deal with this before schools re-open.”

He just hangs up. 

Mxm. 

“Ukhuluma nobani?” That would be my big brother. 

“NoThabang. UNosipho umtshel’ ezibuhlungu. I’m trying to fix their relationship.” I say.

He nods his head. He gives me a cider then leans against my car. 

“Who bought this car for you, Ndalo?” He asks me. 

“I bought it myself.” 

“With what money? Ngoba imali kaUyanda is tied up into things for the kids. Kids excluding Nosipho, so I know ukuthi whatever you are doing for uNosipho is coming from your own pocket. And Ndalo, you don’t exactly have a job that pays you this well.”

I just keep quiet.

“Ndalo, this secrecy of yours… you have to tell someone. Anything can happen to you when you are with this person and no one except that person would be able to find you or understand what happened to you. Mnta kamah, I’ve never judged you. Ever! I wouldn’t start now. I just want you to be safe. This money you are swimming in smells dangerous. I don’t think you are safe with whoever this is.” He says. 

I do want to tell him. But I’m not ready. 

“Ngi-right, Mthokozisi. And there’s no one. I’m focusing on my children. They are not ready for me to move on. I’m not ready. So please, iyeke le nto!” I say. 

He just shakes his head at me. 

“Ithi ngiyobulisa umah. I’ll see you inside.” I say then leave him there. 

…

I’ve finally met Siyamthanda, Msizi’s daughter. I’d say that our relationship is okay. She’s four so she’s slightly easy. For Christmas, I bought her an iPad – with her father’s permission of course – and we’ve been best friends ever since. 

5!

4!

3!

2!

1!

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

Then the firecrackers go off. It’s the township. This is quite an event that you are invited to without really wanting the invite. 

Msizi and I had planned to go out and celebrate with his friends. I’ve only met two of his friends and their wives. It was not as difficult as I thought it would be. They recognized who I am. They asked me questions and I guess they were impressed that I wasn’t defensive. I just answered what I knew how I knew it. And now, I’m in a WhatsApp group I’d honestly rather not be part of. Msizi says I shouldn’t dismiss it completely. They are being nice. Whatever.

Anyway, we didn’t go out because Siyamthanda caught a really bad stomach bug. So, she’s seen a doctor and everything. She has medication and all. Her fever has gone down, so that’s a good thing. But she’s in no shape to go out. The grandmother is at my mother’s house alongside other grandmothers of the township, praying into the new year. 

Siyamthanda is fast asleep now. She’s in the middle of the bed. I’m lightly brushing her back, soothing her to sleep and settle her stomach. It used to work on all of Mandisa’s kids when they couldn’t sleep for whatever reason.

“I brought us some champagne”, Msizi says, walking into the bedroom with an open champagne bottle and two champagne flutes. 

“Thank you”, I say. 

He kisses me and says, “Happy New Year, baby.” 

“Happy New Year, baby”. Me. 

“Is she out?” He asks me. 

“Yeah. And her fever is down.”

“You are really good at this.” He says. 

“I had practice with all of my sisters’ kids – mostly the girls. She has five kids. I had practice with four. It’s good to know that I haven’t lost my touch.” I say.

“You haven’t. At all. You make an amazing and gentle mother.” He says. 

We smile at each other. 

“I think we can leave her to sleep then we make our way to the TV room?” He says. 

“You sure?” I suddenly don’t want to leave her side. 

“She’s going to be fine”, he says.

“I don’t want to leave her alone. Maybe we can still sit in here? On the couch in here?” 

He frowns through his spectacles.

“Please.” Me.

“Fine.” He says. 

We are now sitting on the couch enjoying some champagne together. 

“She adores you”, he tells me.

“I adore her too. Just like I adore her father.” I say. 

He blushes. 

“I’m a bit scared though”, I say.

I’m sorry, but I have to be selfish with this.

“Scared? Of what?” He asks me. 

“We are getting close, but her mother can come any day and rip her away from me.” I say. 

He looks at me, nodding his head as if agreeing with what I’m saying. 

“I want to be in her life. I want her to be in mine. I want to give my all in my relationship with her. I want to be her mother. But I have this fear that’s a barrier between me giving my whole heart into being her mother.” I say.

“I hear you. Soooo…. I went to see her mother.” He says. 

I look at him. I want him to continue. 

“Her parole was denied. The king heard my plea.” He says. 

“Okay.” Me.

“And I went to tell her what I did and that I won’t allow her access to Siyamthanda when she comes out.” 

“Msizi, are you aware that she is Siyamthanda’s mother?” 

“She’s changed, Khosi. She looked like she was part of some gang and she’s a full-time thug now. She even pulled a knife out on me.” 

Heh?!

“Something is very off about that woman. I checked with the officials what her track record is. She’s been charged with three murders inside, one of them being that of a prison warden. She goes to court next week Monday. She might never come out.” He says. 

I look at him. 

“Even if she does, she’s not ruining this for us.” He says. 

I take a deep breath. 

“What if she knows people on the outside? And she organises for us to get hurt?” I ask.

“She would have done that by now. I think her power is mostly inside the prison.” He says.

I drink my champagne. 

“Are you okay?” He asks me. 

I nod my head. 

“This is us, Khosi. This is the beginning of our family. Maybe we can have three more-

I laugh. 

What?!

Aowa!

“Whatever we decide, it is us.”

“Msizi, I don’t want kids. One of the things that really was an issue in mine and Tee-le’s relationship was that he wanted kids and I didn’t want any. If you do want to have more children, then we will have to break up. But I don’t want to find myself birthing kids one after another thinking that I’m doing it for you, while I resent you more and more for it. We have Siya. We should be okay.”

He’s not reacting the way that Tee-le reacted. I guess he’s a bit more open-minded about this.

“If that’s your decision, I’ll respect it.” He says. 

“Are you sure? You shouldn’t feel like you need to compromise neither”, I say. 

“I know. But I’m good with Siya. I wasn’t prepared for her. She arrived before I could even make a decision about whether or not I wanted kids. So, I look after her and I love her. But if I don’t have anymore, it wouldn’t be the worst thing that happened to me.” He says. 

I get up from the couch I’m on and I go sit on his lap. I kiss him. He runs his hands up my thighs. 

I take off his spectacles. 

Things get heated! 

…

It is the first day of the year. We are awake. Siya is still asleep. We’ve just showered. So now, I have to wake Siya up and at least bath her. So, I wear a dress nje that I don’t mind getting wet in.

By the time I’m done dressing up, Msizi has woken Siya up. She’s looking A LOT better. I still don’t want to go out today. But shame, we’ve been indoors since the family day after Christmas because Siya was sick. So, I understand why Msizi wants to be with his friends today and go to this silly picnic that we’ve all decided to plan at Tholoana World for the kids. 

I bath Siya, asking her how she’s feeling. She’s very excited for Tholoana World. I guess she’s well on her way to recovery, but she still needs to take her meds and finish them. No excuses. 

When she’s done, I lotion her and dress her up in denim shorts, a cute yellow t-shirt and white sneakers. I put her afro into a nice and fluffy pony. She has very rich hair. I do her edges with the Native Child hair growth gel and she’s instantly obsessed.

Her father is in a meeting now. He did say he has to meet with other lawyers to see a client’s deal through. I don’t understand the lingo, but I know his meetings happen any day and any time. He has international clients, so knock off time means nothing in his world. 

I make breakfast for the three of us because Siya has to take her medication. She’s in the TV area sitting on the couch while I pace around in the kitchen.

“Thank you for making me pretty like you”, she says to me. 

I just giggle and say, “But you are a stunning princess. You are even prettier than me.” 

She laughs. 

“I like having you around. I like you as my dad’s girlfriend. I like you as my mom.” 

Weh!

This child knows big things! I suspect the grandmother! 

“I asked my dad if I can call you mom”, she says. 

Ai, this child was sick just the other day. How is she saying all these things right now? 

“He said I can if you don’t mind because you are going to be my mom.” 

I can’t believe Msizi entertained this and said that without even talking to me. 

“So, Khosi…”

Fucken hell! 

“Can I call you mom?” 

And she’s staring at me. 

“You know I love you, right?” I say.

She nods her head. 

“And I’d do anything for you?” I say. 

She nods her head. 

“If that makes me good enough for you to call me mom, I’d be very honoured, my baby.” I say. 

She sprints to me and hugs me. 

Why am I feeling so emotional? Why?! 

“Baby, go get dressed. I’ll feed Siya. We are going to be late”, Msizi comes down the stairs and says. I already have Siya sitting on the kitchen island and eating. 

“You sure?” I ask. 

“Surely, I can still feed a child.” He says. 

Siya giggles. 

“Okay fine. Please give her her medication when you are done.” I say.

He kisses me and takes her plate from me. 

“Nawe udle, Msizi.” I say. 

“Yes babe, I will.”

I head upstairs and get dressed. I wear red high-waist paints. My bum is nicely shaped and my flat stomach is doing the damn things! I wear a nude vest-shaped body suit. I just wear this smart watch that Msizi bought for me. It’s a cute Michael Kors smart watch. I love it! Then I wear a Michael Kors bracelet that the watch came with. 

I decide to leave the wig alone today. I comb my massive afro out then just put a silky headband around my head, pushing the afro backwards. I use gel to do right by my edges. Then I wear my hoop earrings. I wear flat stylish slop sandals. On an ordinary day, I’d wear heels. But I am a mom today. 

I take a big Dior handbag. I put in changing clothes for Siya, a costume for those water activities at that place, and a jersey for later. I put in my essentials as well. I take Msizi’s iPad and PowerBank because his work can call him any time. 

I pack meds for Siya for later and a fleece blanket because I know she will pass out and need a blanket to sleep. 

I have to be prepared! Always! 

I go downstairs and I just hear laughter and chatter between Msizi and Siya. 

Then they pause and look at me. Msizi’s mouth is open. I mean, I’m not wearing anything spectacular! Even my make up today is not glam, it’s just everyday look cute make up. Hai bo!

“You look wow, mama”, Siya says. My heart almost melts. 

I just smile at them.

“Thanks guys”, I say.

I quickly check my phone.

This damn group has over thirty messages. 

I open it. 

I catch up with the messages. The only thing that’s important here is that we must bring snacks for our kids if they are particular. Today may be full at Tholoana World and no one wants to be in the long lines. 

“Babe, we need to start at a shop.” 

He’s still staring at me. 

Hai bo! 

…

We arrive at Tholoana World in Msizi’s one series. I really like this car.

His phone keeps getting messages. 

“Eish, and I left my MacBook and iPad at home.” He says. Clearly there’s a meeting coming up. 

“I took the iPad for you. And the power bank.” I say. 

He is so moved.

“You are honestly a God-sent.” 

I smile. 

“I need to get into a quick meeting.” He says. 

“Okay, we will walk in so long.” I say. 

“No. Wait for me. I won’t be long.” He says. 

“Okay, but I’m stepping outside. It’s hot!” I say. 

Siya and I step outside a bit. 

“Khosi?” I hear a voice. I turn around and see Mandisa and all five of her kids. 

“Hey Ncane”, the kids greet me. 

Pheelo grows taller every time I see him. 

We are all pleasant, except for Mandisa. 

Siya is next to me now, holding my hand.

“Guys, this is my baby girl, Siyamthanda.” I say, picking her up. 

Mandisa’s look! 

“Siya, these are your cousins and your Mam’khulu.” I say. 

Mandisa’s look!

My nieces and nephew introduce themselves to Siya. 

Siya seems happy. 

“Can we talk?” Mandisa. 

“I can take Siya, if that’s okay.” Sethunya, the first born, says. 

“Don’t go far, please.” I say. 

They give us some space. 

“Enye futhi indoda? With a child?” She says. 

I just look at her.

“Khosi, uyajola futhi? Have you forgot how this story ends? Then poor Mandisa must come and pick up the pieces when it all falls apart again?” 

Msizi comes out of the car and stands next to me. 

“Msizi”, he introduces himself to Mandisa.

“Mandisa”, she says. 

Then she looks at me and says, “Khosi, you were doing so well. You finally put your life back together. Now this?”

“I haven’t done anything wrong, Mandisa. Or what? I shouldn’t move on with my life?” I say. 

“Does moving on always have to feature a man?” Her.

“It did for you? You were not even out of your mourning clothes when you were pregnant with Dikwe’s child.” I say.

“I left my home and looked for you the last time a man left you high and dry, begging on the side of the road in a foreign country. I took my money and bought you a car. I set you up again. You have a job because of me! You were black-balled everywhere – pushed out of the kingdom. My husband had to pull strings for you to still be here.”

“And thank you, Mandisa! Or what? Do I owe you my life?” 

“You owe me to not fuck up again because of a man!” 

I’m silent. 

“If he fucks up, don’t call me.” She says. 

“I never called you in the first place. You just love being needed. You can’t help yourself. You accused me of being the pretty sister? Well, you are the insecure saviour sister. So don’t worry, I’ll never worry you or bother you. I never have anyway.” 

We stare at each other. 

I walk away first to get Siya from her kids. But Siya and Pheelo are playing. I don’t know how to separate them. 

“Siya, let’s go, baby.” Me. 

“Can Pheelo come with us?” Siya. 

I look at Mandisa. 

“He will be safe, Mandisa. I’ve never hurt your kids before. We are here with friends and other kids.” I say.

“Fine. Phone me when you leave.” She says. 

I nod my head.

“Yes!” Pheelo says. 

We take both kids with us – Msizi and I. 

“Are you okay?” Msizi asks me as we walk towards our friends. Pheelo and Siya are running and playing ahead of us. 

I nod my head. But my heart is aching and I feel emotional. 

He hugs me. 

“I’m not going to hurt you. And your sister will come around. Don’t let this get to you.”

I nod my head.

“Let’s try have a good day.” He says. 

I nod. 

We kiss.