Keith’s family is having a family meeting today for Michael and Masingita – Keith’s eldest brother and his wife. I’m at my mom’s house with Risuna and mzala. Firstly, I’m not Keith’s wife, so I can’t just be next door as and when I please. My mom reminds me every chance she gets. Phela, Keith wanted me to be next door to help Charity to cook and prepare for the meeting. Charity is Samuel’s wife – the other brother. My mom told me that there’s a difference between Charity and me: she’s a wife and I’m just a girlfriend deep within vat-n-sit. Tough I tell you. So, I’m home and I’m watching my baby play about. He’s also quite excited that I’m here with him today. He’s so used to me leaving him on weekends. I can see that he’s excited that for a change, I’m here. 

Mzala comes every weekend to help us with Risuna. That way, we take him to places more now. On days where we are at home and not really busy, I ask her to clean the house. We have to pay her for something phela. Keith and I are very hands-on with Risuna, so when there’s no trip, she kinda watches TV the whole day. 

“Masingita is already crying”, Keith texts me. 

“Why?” I reply.

“No one knows. Michael just walked in and she started crying. I guess she knows that her shit is about to be aired.” Keith.

“I don’t understand why she requested this meeting if she knows that she’s been making Michael raise a child that’s not his. It’s not like she doesn’t know why this separation is happening.” Me.

“Manipulative! That’s what she is. I don’t even want to be here. I don’t understand why I’m here. Worst of all, my dad is here. Mike, Sam and I are already annoyed.” Keith.

He really doesn’t like his father. None of them do. They don’t rate him at all. 

“Eish. Hang in there, babe. Are we sleeping over this side?” I ask him.

“Nah. I need sex tonight and your mother practically banned you from coming this side. Plus, I really miss my boy. I feel like we haven’t hung out in the longest time.” 

I know what he means. 

“Okay. We will definitely wait up for you. Your boy is being very naughty nje. He’s very curious. Maybe we should do something tomorrow… just the three of us.” I suggest. 

“I’d love that. What did you have in mind?” He asks me.

“A picnic in our backyard? We don’t have to go far. You put up a trampoline, slide, swing and jungle gym out there for him. There’s also the treehouse. Surely you did it so that we could enjoy our own house. So we can enjoy it with him.” Me.

“I like that idea. I’m for it. We can have our picnic. And mzala?” Him.

“I’ll leave her here with mama. At least she will catch one taxi to her house as opposed to three from our house.” Me.

He sends me a thumbs up. 

Then he says, “The meeting is starting, babe.” 

“Okay love. I’m going to play with the rascal and hopefully squeeze in a movie.” I text back.

“I love you both, mami.” Him.

“We love you too, papi.” Me.

I put my phone away. 

“Mzala, do you need me for anything?” Mzala asks me.

“Nah, mzala. I’m good.” I say.

“Okay, ke saya koTavern neh. I just want to get tsepedi tsetharu fela.” She says.

“Enjoy.” I say.

“Must I bring you a Savana nyana?” She asks me.

“No thanks, mzala. Ke shup.” I say.

She says shup then leaves. She loves her Savana shame. What I like about her is that her kids don’t starve. She drinks a lot, but she drinks with whatever change is left after she supports her kids. 

I set up Risuna’s playpen now so that he plays within the playpen. He’s just too busy and I don’t need him getting hurt. As soon as I’m done, I put him in his playpen. He doesn’t fight with me. He is actually intrigued because the playpen has activity walls. I put the toys in that he needs to match the activities on the walls. He looks at me. I sit right outside of the playpen. I give him the first activity block. I take another one and I show him how to put it on the wall. He looks at me again. I take another block then I place it again. Now he gets into it. So now we start doing it together. 

“Where’s mzala?” My mom asks as Risuna and I are deep within our activity.

“She said she’s going to the Tavern to get a drink or two.” I say. 

She shakes her head. Why is she shaking her head? She also loves her beer. They are the same. 

She sits down on a couch close to her. She observes Risuna and I. 

“Keng mama?” I enquire. She’s looking at me like she’s got something to say.

“Has Keith hinted at all about marrying you? Especially with all these weddings that the two of you keep on attending.” She says.

“Mama, we just started dating. Can we at least enjoy that first?”

“I don’t know, Basetsana. You and Keith first had a child, then you moved in together, then you dated. I just figured that since you start things from the back and make your way to the front, marriage wouldn’t be such a bad idea.” She says.

I feel like she’s judging me.

I don’t say anything.

“Keith has already been married, Basetsana. Nothing excites him about marriage anymore. If you are also going to be complacent, nana, you’ll be his girlfriend until Risuna is a teenager.” She says.

I think I’ve heard enough. But I won’t lie, she does have me thinking. A lot. 

It is 8pm when Keith knocks on the door, basically coming to fetch Risuna and me. My mom is the one who gets the door. With all the stuff that she was saying to me this afternoon, I don’t want her to speak to Keith because I just know that she will just embarrass me or make things awkward between Keith and I for the rest of the evening. But this is my mother… this is Mathapelo Mofokeng and she does whatever she wants whenever she wants to do it. So, I’m just going to chilling in the bedroom until my mom comes to fetch me. I don’t want to be there to see Keith’s reaction. 

“Mzala, ke Keith”, she says.

I know. 

“Ja, eish. Mama today was just being herself, so I know she’s about to grill him. I don’t want to be there.” Me.

“Let’s go stand in the passage and listen.” Mzala says. 

She’s also terrified of my mom and she’s my mother’s youngest sister. I used to think this happens between a last born and older siblings. But then I saw Meme and Morafe. So now I just believe it’s my mom who’s just the difficult one. She’s number three of four sisters. Mzala comes after her. But even the older two are scared of her. 

Mzala and I are now standing in the passage. My mom and Keith are sitting in the TV room and are talking.

My mom: “Keith, are you perhaps disrespecting my daughter and me because there’s no man that we live with here? Because I don’t have a husband and Basetsana’s father is nowhere to be found?” 

This is unnecessarily tense.

Keith: “No mama. I’m not disrespecting you at all. I’d never do that. I love Basetsana so much.” 

My mom: “You love her? Is this how you treat people that you love? Keith, you came to this house to acknowledge and pay damages only for Risuna. And I allowed you to take him and rename him as your son. I didn’t give you a difficult time, did I?”

Keith: “No mama, you didn’t. And thank you for that. I know that I didn’t deserve your kindness, mama. But you gave it to me even after the way that I treated Bassie. I’ll never apologise enough for that.” 

My mom: “Yet Keith, you take Basetsana, live with her and make her your wife without officially notifying me as her mother. I haven’t seen so much as a chicken from you to tell me that you are taking my child and living with her. I understand Risuna living with you. He’s your child. Basetsana is my child. And last I checked, she was not your wife. So why do you continue to disrespect Basetsana and me like this?” 

Keith is silent. 

I charge towards the TV room where they are sitting because really, these are unfair questions. 

But mzala pulls me back. So, I continue to listen. 

Mom: “Keith, I know that you have been married before. I’m aware of that. But Basetsana has never been married. And what you are doing to Basetsana is not fair. You’ve made her a wife without doing the right thing by her. So Keith, if you want to continue living with Basetsana and doing all these things that you are doing with her now, you will marry her. If not, I want my daughter back in this house to be the young girl that she is instead of the wife you’ve made her be. Am I clear?”

A whole ultimatum vele?

Now I just grab my child and our bags from the bedroom and make my way into the TV room.

“I’m ready to go”, I say as I stand next to him. He’s still sitting on the couch and is looking very disturbed. Risuna is already diving to him. He takes Risuna then stands up. 

“Goodnight, mama. I’ve heard you.” He says to my mom.

“Le tsamayeng hanhle”, my mom says then heads to the bedroom. Keith can just see that I’m upset. 

We are in the car now driving back to our place. Risuna is sitting at the back singing some weird song that he probably learned at crèche. I’m in the front passenger seat, looking out of the window. Keith is just driving. There’s silence between the two of us. I’m the one that’s feeling pressed to say something, so I begin, “Keith, I’m sorry about what my mom said. Just so you know, there’s no pressure from me for us to get married.”

He takes a deep breath then says, “How long has your mother been feeling this way?” 

“She mentions it every time we come here. I just didn’t think that she was this passionate about it.” I say.

“Why didn’t you tell me the first time she mentioned it?” 

“Because I don’t agree with her putting pressure on our relationship”, I say.

“Do you think that I’m disrespecting you, Basetsana?” 

“No. But I do want to get married at some point. It is a little bit scary that marriage doesn’t excite you anymore because you’ve already done it.” 

“And when did you start feeling this way? Somewhere between all these weddings that we’ve been attending?” 

Why is he being like this?! I was just apologising because I didn’t want him to feel bad. But his reaction has me thinking that my mother might be on to something.

“Do you not see marriage in the future for us, Keith?” I ask him.

“Did I say that?!”

“Why are you being like this?! I’m not the one who is putting this pressure on you. I’m telling you that I don’t have any issues, but you are taking it out on me! Why?!” I say.

He just unbuttons the top button of his golf t-shirt and remains focused on the road.

“You don’t have to marry me if you don’t want to, Keith. I don’t want you if it’s forced. Just like you don’t have to be in a relationship with me just because we have a child together. We can always co-parent. We wouldn’t be the first people to do it. But at least be honest with me about it so that I can be with someone who will love and respect me enough to find me worthy of marriage”, I say.

“So, you do feel like I disrespect you! And now you are also giving me an ultimatum?! Really, Basetsana?!” Now he’s shouting.

“I’m not giving you an ultimatum. I’m telling you how I feel and I’m telling you that I’m not going to be Noria’s replacement. I already live with the fact that I’m in her place. She’s supposed to be my son’s mother and she’s supposed to be my man’s wife. So, when my man reminds me that’s how it’s supposed to be, what am I supposed to do?!” I’m also shouting now.

“How am I reminding you of that?! Huh?! How?! By not marrying you?! You women make such a big deal out of this… unnecessarily so. Do you get a certificate or something for marriage?! Why is it so glamourised in your life?!” 

Before I can even respond, I just hear a loud bang. Our car is spinning out of control… at some point, it’s even turning upside down. It’s bumping on the tar road now. There are lights. 

“Keith”… I say.

Nothing. 

“Risuna.” I say.

Nothing. 

I also just ———

….

….

….

I’m waking up in hospital. I have some machines attached to me and I feel stiff. Very stiff. 

I see my mother. 

I see mzala.

I see Wandi and Morafe. 

I see Tamia.

What’s happening?! Where am I?! Where’s Keith?  Where’s my child?!

“Keith?” I say.

“He’s in recovery. The guys are with him.” Wandi tells me.

“Where’s Risuna?” I ask.

Silence.

“Where’s my child?” I ask more aggressively.

“They said there was no child when they found you guys. They even searched surrounding areas where you had the accident. He wasn’t there. There wasn’t even a car seat”, my mom.

“What do you mean?! Where’s my child?!” I’m asking. I’m angry. I’m crying. I’m in pain. I hear machines going off. Someone comes in… nurses, I think. They do something… I’m drifting away again.

…

I don’t understand what they mean when they say that my son was not in the car when they found us. He was there. They are telling me that there wasn’t even a car seat. I don’t understand. I keep wanting to go and see Bassie, but I’m being told that she’s not in a good state and when she heard that Risuna is missing, she lost her shit and had to be sedated again. Where the hell would my child go?!

“We will do our best to find him, Keith. We promise you”, Ntuthuko tells me.

“Where the fuck is my child?! Where is he?! Who steals a child off an accident?! Who?!” I’m actually very hysterical and incredibly inconsolable. 

“Hey Keith”, I hear a familiar voice.

I look up. 

It’s Noria. 

I’m not in the mood for this. I’m really not. 

“I’m sorry about your accident. How are you feeling?” She asks me.

I just look at her.

The gents are not sure if they should leave or if they should stay. I’m sure my brothers and mother are on their way. I was told that Bassie’s mother and mzala are here. I wonder if my family have been told. I’d like to believe that despite her anger towards me not marrying her daughter yet, Bassie’s mother would at least tell my mother that I’ve been in an accident. 

“We are right outside, Keith.” Senzi says then gets the gents to follow him out. 

It’s just Noria and I now.

She tries to hold my hand. I pull it away. It hurts, but I don’t want her touching me. 

“Risuna is fine”, she says.

I look at her. 

She wouldn’t dare! She would never! 

“He’s getting the best medical treatment you could possibly find in South Africa. As his mother, I’d never let anything happen to him.”

“Noria, what did you do?!” 

“Seeing that Basetsana has no shame in taking what doesn’t belong to her, I thought two could play that game.” 

“What?!”

“She took my man. So, I took her child.” She says.

“Noria, bring my child back.” I say.

“And I will. But on condition that I get my husband back.” She says.

“But we are divorced”, I say.

“I know. But then I thought to myself, why would I just give you up when I don’t want to?! Why let some homewrecking hood rat take you from me when I still want to be with you?! She doesn’t get to win. Ever! And I’m very happy to teach her kind a lesson… a lesson that her family clearly failed to teach her. She doesn’t get to be a slut in my marriage, and she most certainly doesn’t get to be the slut that wins. I gave that bitch ten million rands to fuck off – I think I more than compensated her for any inconvenience caused by making her get pregnant and changing my mind at a later stage. What was she still doing with my man?! So much so that my man filed a divorce against me, Noria Nkuna?! Oh hell no! She messed with the wrong woman, and if she wants her little brat back, she hands me my man back first. These uncouth homewrecking sluts treacherously breaking people’s homes like it’s their right will be the end of us. Not here! Not with Noria Nkuna.” 

“Noria, please.”

“I want my husband back, Keith. I’ll give her that child of hers if she gives me my husband. She has forty-eight hours to return you to my home. Otherwise, I traffic that little son of a bitch. Call me.” She says then leaves. I just weep on my bed.

…

I’m in Bassie’s ward. Everyone is here. Her friends. Her mother. Mzala. Wandi’s mom. My mom is also here. The guys are in here too. My brothers are here too. I’ve just told everyone what Noria said to me. Basetsana is so angry. 

“Go back to her”, Bassie says.

What?! 

“I want my child back, Keith. Go back to that sick bitch you married and bring me back my child”, she says.

“Bassie, I want to be with you,” I tell her.

“If you really wanted to be with me, Keith, we wouldn’t have had the argument that landed us in that accident. She is who you want. So go back to her and bring me back my child.” 

“Bassie –

“Keith, if anything happens to my child because of your indecisiveness regarding who you want to be with, I’ll never forgive you. You’ll be dead to me. That’s a promise. Go back to that lunatic. I want my child next to me when I wake up tomorrow morning.” 

Then she looks away from me. She cries in her mother’s arms. 

I cry too. 

This cannot be the end for us. It cannot! 

My brother wheels me out of here. I’ve been discharged so I’m heading home. I’m going to get my child back.

–

The house feels so big and cold without them. The first thing I stumble upon is Risuna’s toy. I just kneel down, break down and cry. How could Noria do this?! Why would she do this?! My child?! Whatever decision that I make, I’m never going to be in his life. That’s essentially what she has said. How is my son supposed to grow up without me? 

“Keith”, Wandi’s mother says. 

I’m still crying. I cannot even look at her.

“Keith, I need you to talk to me. I can help you find this child.” Wandi’s mom.

How is she going to do that? How?! I don’t want people giving me false hope.

“Keith, I need you to calm down and talk to us. Time is running out and Risuna’s life is depending on you manning up, being strong and helping us help you. Sukuma ndoda!” Ntuthuko.

Why are they losing their patience with me?! And what are they going to do?! Honestly?!

But I calm down. 

My mom gives me water.

I have a drink.

Ntuthuko, Wandi’s mom and some other guys that I recognise from the kingdom ask me questions about Noria, her family, where they live and what their connections are. I answer them to the best of my ability. They nod their heads when they are done then they leave the house. 

It’s just my mom, my brothers and me that are now left in the house. Senzi had to go back to the hospital. I have no way of reaching Basetsana and I just need to talk to her right now, no one else. 

“You need to eat then take your medication, Keith”, my mom says.

“My son probably hasn’t eaten wherever he is. And that medication makes me sleep. I can’t sleep until I have my son with me.” I say. 

“Keith, when he comes back, he will need you to be strong… not to be dying.” My mom. 

I just look at her. I eat a banana then take these damn meds. 

“Bassie’s mother told me that I’m disrespecting her and Bassie by living with Bassie yet not indicating any intentions of marrying her. We were fighting about that on the road when we got into that accident. We were both upset because she felt like I’m not over Noria and that’s why I don’t want to marry her. I just don’t think marriage is what women make it out to be – especially women who have never been married before. Yes, I’ve seen the disaster of a failed marriage and it hasn’t exactly made marriage the most attractive thing to do in my eyes. Plus, Bassie and I were good. And I was angry that she was letting the weddings all around her as well as her mother get into her ear, convincing her that what we had wasn’t enough and that marriage would make it enough. The accident happened. I don’t think we will come back from this. Plus, Noria is back and she’s just pouring gasoline to the fire. Did you see the way that Bassie looked at me?” I’m telling this to my mother and my brothers. 

“What exactly do you want, Keith? Bassie’s mother is not unreasonable in expecting you to marry her daughter if you are ready to live with her and raise a child with her. You are living a married life, just without the title.” Michael says.

“And Bassie is not here to just be your girlfriend forever. She’s not living with you just so you could chill and never intend to marry her”, Samuel. 

“I definitely don’t want Noria. I can’t go back there.” I say.

“Maybe try being single for some time. Bassie feels like she’s in your life only because Noria isn’t in your life. And maybe there’s a small chance of that being true. You never really stayed single for five minutes after you divorced Noria and maybe you need to just be on your own, focus on your son and figure things out before moving on. At least now, you know what both parties want. Noria wants you no matter what. And Bassie wants you without reservation. She wants the whole package. If you decide to be with Bassie, you’ll be with her understanding that. And if you are keen, you can do this with her again.” Michael.

“I don’t want to lose my family”, I tell them.

“You’ll lose them if you don’t fix yourself up first. Do it for them.” Samuel. 

I make my way to my bedroom to sleep. I wish that I could just speak to Bassie. I wish that I could just hold my child. The wall of my bedroom has a wall-size photograph of Bassie, Risuna and me. We are so happy. We are so perfect. Why does Noria want to come between this?! Why does she want to take this away from my son?! Why is she putting him through so much trauma?! 

I just cry my heart out. Somehow, I end up falling asleep. It must be the meds.

…

Basetsana was never going to get away with stealing my man from me. Never! Just because she has eggs and a womb that works, she thought that she could take my man and bribe him with a child? Heh! She does not who she is dealing with. I am Noria Nkuna, and I will show her what we do to girls that do not respect people’s marriages. I am sick and tired of these women who believe that people’s husbands are fair game. If those are her views, then her child is also fair game. 

I was following them when that accident happened. I just wanted to ‘accidentally’ bump into Keith and perhaps talk to him. He had blocked me on every platform that I could possibly reach him on. What other choice did I have? I had to construct scenarios for us to have face to face conversations. Then the accident happened. It seems as if he was distracted by something because the accident was his fault. I witnessed it all. I am the one who phoned the police and the ambulance. But I did see an opportunity for myself and Keith to reunite… be what we were supposed to be before Basetsana came into our lives. So, I took the baby. He didn’t seem too hurt, but there was blood. I rushed him to the hospital and he has been receiving first class medical care. He could’ve been mine. This baby could have been calling me mommy and Keith would still be calling me his wife. But I lost focus for five minutes and that bitch stole my life in a heartbeat. But she will pay. I’ll make sure of it. 

Risuna is up and crying now. He must be in pain. I need him discharged before Keith and his wife try to be cute by posting his photo everywhere and saying that he is missing. I try to calm him down, but he is not stopping. Maybe something is wrong with him. I call a nurse. The nurse explains to me that he is in shock and he is in pain. But he should calm down once he sees someone familiar next to him. Eish. I am not familiar. But I am his mother – legally that is. Keith, Basetsana and I have a contract that says so. 

He cries for another hour and the nurses are looking at me funny because I cannot calm my own child down. But now he sleeps. And I have a bit of peace. I go to the toilet while he’s asleep. I notice someone going into Risuna’s ward. I look behind me. I see no one. I see no movement. I take a walk back to his ward. I see no one. Maybe I am being paranoid. No one knows that he is here. No one knows that I have him except for Keith. And telling Basetsana would put him in hot water, so I doubt that he told her. He doesn’t love her THAT MUCH. 

I go back to the toilet. I do my business. I hear the toilet door open. It’s probably someone using the stall next to the one that I am using. I take my time, then I finally finish. I flush the toilet and head to wash my hands. 

“Hello, my love”, some ghetto man who looks like he lives off rat-invested environments says to me. Ewu!

“This is a female restroom. The male restroom is next door.” I say, not even looking at him. 

“I’m not looking for a toilet. Angifuni ukubhosha mina. I am looking for you.” He says.

“Me? To do what?” I ask him. 

“To kill you.” He says. 

I laugh then say, “To kill me? For what?!” 

“For stealing Basetsana’s child.” 

Now he has my attention. 

“I didn’t steal any child.” 

“Risuna is not your child and his parents want him back.” He says. 

I am breathing heavily now. I try to push him away then run to the ward because it’s registering to me that someone else may be in there taking my child as we speak. But he pushes me back into the restroom, slamming me against a wall. My body is in pain as I fall to the ground and start crying. 

Another man comes into the restroom. 

“You found her?” The man says. 

“Yebo m’deacon. I found her”, the one who pushed me says. 

“And yaz, ngihalele ikhekhe namhlanje”, the second creep says, already taking off his pants. 

“Merry Christmas. She’s all yours. I’ll help Maphuthi get the child discharged.” The first creep says. 

So, I’m going to get raped while they take the child? Oh no! 

I’m already crying. The first guy leaves. 

The horny creep looks at me. He puts his pants back on and tells me how much of a turn off I am as a woman because I do despicable things. 

“I just want to talk to Keith. Please.” I beg him. 

“You did all of this just to talk to Keith?” A woman says… she just walked in. 

“I just need to speak to him. Please.” I say. 

“You are going to prison. I’ll make sure that he visits you there.” She says. 

“Prison?! Me?! Aseblief tog… my dad will have me out of a cell within seconds of me being processed.” I say. 

“We will see about that now, won’t we? Your dad is not the only person that is connected to powerful people.” The woman. 

What does she mean by this?! 

The police walk in. 

These people are seriously having me arrested?! Me?! Noria Nkuna?!

“I need to speak to Keith. Please. If he comes to see me, I promise you… I won’t fight what is happening right now. I’ll take it and I’ll do my time. I just need to see him. That’s all I ask. It’s important. If he really wants me to close this chapter of our lives then let him be with Basetsana, he will come and see me. Otherwise, this isn’t the last that he has seen or heard of me – him and Basetsana. And I’ll tell you now… I wasn’t working alone.” Those are my final words before the police drag me out of here.

I’m thrown into a police van. It’s filthy and it smells. This is a clear violation of any person’s human rights. How does anyone sit and tolerate this kind of filth for longer than a minute? 

The van takes off and these animals are driving this van like it’s an arcade go-art. My hands are tied in their cuffs and they are speeding, hitting speed bumps like complete morons who bought their driver’s license, then take unnecessarily sharp corners at the highest speed possible. I’ve hit my head seven times against the filth of this van. My body hurts even more. 

“FUCK OFF YOU FUCKEN CUNTS!” I yell at them. 

“Uthini lo?!” They all say. 

“DO YOU KNOW WHO MY FATHER IS?! DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHO’S DAUGHTER I AM?! YOU WILL ALL BE PART OF THE UNEMPLOYMENT STATISTIC BY TOMORROW MORNING! MARK MY WORDS!” I yells. 

“Voetsek wena sboshwa!”’

“SBOSHWA IS YOUR MQUNDU!” I am kallid! They mustn’t go there with me. We know how to swear!

I think my bravery scares them a bit. 

We finally get to a police station. I’ll be in these holding cells for tonight. I thought that they’d just take me there. But no… they fucken process me. I am charged with child kidnapping. The processing takes about an hour, then another police officer takes me to a cell.

“My phone call”, I say. 

The lady looks at me. 

She gives her cellphone. 

I dial my father. 

“Hello?” He answers his phone.

“Pa. I am arrested. Please come and get me or get me a lawyer.” I say. 

“Arrested? Vir wat?!” He’s so shocked. 

“Child-kidnapping. I’ll explain when you get here. Please just get here.” I say. 

“Which police station are you at?”

“Somewhere in Pretoria”, I say. 

“Are you processed?” 

“Yes daddy.” 

“I’ll find you. Hang on tight. Give that officer next to you the phone.” He says. 

I give her the phone and say, “He’s asking to speak with you.”

“Hello?” 

…

“Okay.”

…

“Okay.”

She hangs up. 

I know my father pulled through for me. 

I am put in a single cell. 

She locks the door, and the cell is just… dark…

I’m not even scared. I just miss my husband.