We’ve been in Tholoana Kingdom for a ceremony for my grandkids – it’s crazy saying this out loud. Yoh. But they are beautiful babies and I love them to bits. Thomas and I had planned to stay at a hotel, but the Mohales insisted we stay at the royal house. There’s an entire wing for guests here. When I was with Khotso, I never even came to this side of the palace. I’m avoiding Khotso at all costs. I even hold in my pee if I bump into him on my way to the toilet. 

We are going home today, and I’m already packed up. After breakfast, we are out of here. 

“I’m not sure if Fifi and her family are going back to South Africa with us”, I say. 

“She said she wanted to go back home, but she’d tell me everything before we left.” 

I look at him. 

“What does she want to tell you?” I ask. 

“I don’t know.” 

“Did you ask Khanyisa? You know she’s always in the loop with Rofhiwa’s things”, I ask him. 

We look at each other and we laugh. Those two…

“Well, I guess we’ll have to be patient and wait for her to tell us.” I say. 

Our bags are packed in our car and we are now having breakfast at the Mohale table. The Mohale family and our family are seated at this table, eating and actually being nice to each other. 

After we’ve downed some good food with good juice, good conversation and great laughter, Rofhiwa and Reahile ask for our attention. I’m holding Mulalo in my arms and Khanyisa has Mohau. 

Reahile begins, “We really want to thank all of you for all your support and for welcoming our kids into both the Ramaru and Mohale family. As a husband to the most beautiful woman on earth – 

“After my wife”, Thomas interjects and people laugh. 

Reahile smiles then continues, “and as a father to two human beings, I need to be responsible for my family and give them a home. Rofhiwa and I will be moving to South Africa permanently.”

Yoh, we are blown away. I’m excited because my grandkids will be closer to me, but damn, Ona looks hurt and Khotso is deeply disturbed. Remo is shocked and Thabi just seems surprised – but unfazed. I think she’s just going through a lot. Any woman that is strong and brave enough to marry Ona must have a PhD in tolerating and living within shit. 

Reahile continues, after taking in our reactions, “Now that I’ve graduated with my masters degree and retired from soccer, I’m building my businesses, starting with the one that I co-own with Tee-le. He will be based here, leading from the Tholoana Kingdom office, and I’ll be based in South Africa, leading from our office there. We already have a few clients that side, so I have to leave today to set up and all.”

“Rofhiwa, what about your job?” Khotso enquires. 

“I’ll be at the village full time leading from there. Tshepi will be managing things this side. I cleared it with Mfundo and we’ve found a way to make it work. I’ll pop in from time to time, but I won’t be here full time.” Fifi says. 

The Mohales are not taking this well.

“Where are you going to live? You can’t live with the Ramarus.” Ona says. Why not? We don’t mind.

“They spoke to me about it”, Kea says. Then she says, “I gifted them your father’s house – Reahile’s house. I changed the title deed into their name, sold all the furniture in there and got new furniture for them. And Rofhiwa, I won’t be hurt if you change the furniture. The one I put in there is just so you guys have furniture when you move in.” 

Fifi smiles and nods her head. 

“It’s a five-bedroom house with everything you’ll need to raise children and be happy.” Kea.

“What about the kids? You guys are first time parents. Do you really think you can raise these kids with no help?” Thabi asks. 

“Mme-mofomahadi, Khanyisa and I interviewed a few people. We found two nannies who will also work as domestic workers. One is Sotho and one is Venda. We would like Mulalo and Mohau to grow up exposed to both languages.” Rofhiwa explains. 

I look at Khanyisa. She shrugs her shoulders at me. Thomas seems very proud. He likes that Reahile wants to be his own man. Rofhiwa is in good hands. 

“Is there anything we can do to change your mind?” Mohato asks. 

Reahile shakes his head and says, “No. I’m theirs first now before I’m anybody else’s. I’ll be good and we’ll visit a lot. You guys can also visit anytime. I just have to step up and be a husband and father first before I’m anything else.” 

“You can’t do that here?” Khotso asks. 

“More and more people are born and this palace is beginning to feel small. My wife and I need the space to be married and experience each other then raise our children as we see best fit. Your support would genuinely mean everything to us.” Reahile. 

Ja neh. The emotions are bittersweet at this table. But I for one am extremely proud of them. I couldn’t have chosen a better partner for our Fifi. 

“They are going to be okay. We’ll be there for them and they are a drive away from you guys”, I say, trying to soothe the situation. 

“No one asked you”, Thabi says to me. 

“No one had to. This is daughter and I don’t need your permission to speak where she’s concerned”, I say.

“Biology begs to differ with you”, she says to me. 

“Says the person who biology would deem infertile and purposeless in this conversation or at this table because clearly, you can’t spot a single fruit of your womb around here.” Me. 

Silence. 

She looks at me with the look she gave Sonia in her drunk state. 

Khotso and Ona look at each other. Then Ona says, “Well, all the best, son. I’m proud of the man that you’ve become and Fifi, thank you for making him a man above all men. We will miss you terribly, but we know you’ll do amazing. I hope the two of you love each other and stay with each other like you are right now until the end of time. I wish you all the best and I love you very much. Take care of each other.” 

That’s beautiful. 

“As the Mohale family, we would like to gift you, makoti warona, with this gift just to say thank you for our grandchildren – our very first grandchildren – and for being who you are to our son.” Khotso says this as Ona gives Fifi a box. Fifi smiles and opens the box. It’s a Mercedes-Benz car key. 

She looks at them. 

“It’s outside”, Ona says smiling. 

Khanyisa jumps up and runs outside faster than Rofhiwa – with Mohau in her arms. Thomas and I also follow them outside. 

We hear SCREAMING and EXCITEMENT from my two obnoxious daughters. 

We step outside and we see them excited and running around the car. It is a black two-door Mercedes-Benz E63 AMG with white interior. Am I the only person who feels like this is inappropriate for a new mother who will be travelling with two kids? I’d actually think that the car is more a gift for Reahile than it is for Fifi, but the number plates read “ROFHIWA TK”. 

Thomas looks happy. I’m just concerned. Rofhiwa needs to fit two car-seats in a car. The GLC coupe we bought for her when she graduated is bigger and a better fit for a mother than this. 

…

We are finally back home. Reahile was following us in Rofhiwa’s new car from the Mohales. My three boys drove back with him. Ranwedzi kept him company in the front seat then Gundo and Rendani sat in the backseat. They were so excited to be in the new car that they didn’t sleep all the way from Tholoana Kingdom to here.

We first stopped at the house they’ve been gifted with from Kea. It’s a stunning house in Saxonworld. The garden is HUGE and the pool is even bigger. They have a two-bedroom cottage outside in their yard where the domestic workers/nannies will be staying. I was personally happy about that. 

We helped them put the kids to sleep then left. All my kids decided that they wanted to sleep over at their house. Thomas and I felt that Rofhiwa and Reahile needed some space to just be together. Since the twins were born, they haven’t had one minute to just be alone with their children. They’ve transitioned into a whole new space of life. They need to adjust together. Moving up here was a great move for them, but us – the Ramarus – we cannot be that family that’s always here and crowding their space. It’s easy to fall into that trap, but I’m tasking myself with ensuring that it does not happen. We will support them, yes, but boundaries are important. While Reahile insisted that Khanyisa and the boys stay, I insisted that I’ll bring them over the night before the housewarming. For now, they need space to settle in. 

Now we are in our own house and I’m in the shower with my man. We are washing each other and getting our bodies ready for sex. The plan is to get out of here and basically take advantage of each other.

We do just that then we drift into bliss, waving the night goodnight. 

…

Leruo and I are married. We are happy, but we have our challenges. His first wife, Paula, has not been accepting of our marriage. At first, I thought she craves attention too much. Now, I realise that she truly thinks that our marriage was created to destroy her. My marriage to Leruo exists independently off her marriage to Leruo. I’m not as invested in her marriage as she is with mine. I have given up now on trying with her. I have accepted that we will never be friends. But, my husband is not well. She has been admitted to a psychiatric clinic and has given strict instructions that Leruo should never be allowed in. I guess she never thought that I’d be interested in seeing her because I was able to pull the Dr Tloung card and I’m going to see her today. We need to talk.

“Do you think I’m a bad husband?” Leruo asks me. He scared me. Last I checked, he had taken our son to school. I thought I was alone in this house.

“Baby, what’s making you think that you are a bad husband?” I ask him.

“I drove my wife into a looney bin”, he says.

I honestly don’t know what to say.

“What am I doing wrong, Zamo?” He asks me.

“I don’t think you are the problem, Leruo. I am the problem here. You married me and everything went pear-shaped”, I say.

“What was I supposed to do, Zamo? I love you. You are the mother of my child. Was I supposed to keep you as a dirty secret for the rest of our lives?” He says.

“Baby, just let me go and see her today. Maybe we can solve this still. She and I need to talk. It’s long overdue”, I tell him.

“Are you sure you want to do this?” He asks me.

I nod my head.

I get up from the bed where I was sitting to wear my heels and walk up towards him. I kiss him. His hands make their way to my ass. No no no. My makeup is done. My hair is done. I need to leave.

I chuckle and pull away.

“Please”, he begs me.

“I need to go”, I say, still laughing.

“I’ll just put in the head”, he says.

“Leruo, stop it. I have to go”, me.

“I have training. I’ll be miserable for the rest of the day if I don’t release”, he says.

Such blackmail.

“Your hand, papa. You’ve had rounds last night and this morning. Your libido is a lot”, I say.

He laughs, but at least he leaves me alone.

…

I am taken to the visitor’s area where I find Paula already sitting and chatting away with two of her friends, Thuli and Renay. I know them because they are always around. They are shocked to see me. I can understand why. I just hope that this is not an uncomfortable discussion. Who am I kidding? This is going to be extremely uncomfortable. Paula is angry to see me. Lord have mercy.

“Good day ladies”, I say.

“Hi”, Thuli says.

Renay and Paula just look at me. Thuli is uncomfortable.

“Paula, I was hoping we could talk”, I say.

I’m expecting her to be a bitch, but she actually nods her head and says, “We do need to talk. If only you paid me this courtesy before you married my husband”.

Ja no, I’m going to need to be humble here. I will need to remind myself that I’m doing this for Leruo.

“You are right. And I apologize for not doing that. I want to make things right. I’m not going anywhere. And you shouldn’t feel bullied out of your marriage neither because that’s not what my intentions are. I want to fix this. I hope we can fix this”, me.

“What exactly are your intentions?” That would be Renay, the scorned wife.

“I don’t owe you any explanations. I’m not that girl who admitted to fucking your husband on national television”, I say.

It hurts her. Good. She’s a bitch this one. I don’t like her. I see her treating people like they are a bad smell and she is above them. She’s not going to do that shit to me.

Renay looks at me, but she doesn’t say anything.

“Renay, let’s maybe go and get something to eat. I think Paula and Nomzamo need to have this conversation without us”, Thuli. I like her. If she wasn’t friends with Paula and Renay, I would have her in my camp. But I also know that she and Tshepi have drama so ja, it was never going to work.

Renay and Thuli leave. I sit where they were sitting. Paula looks… TIRED. Yes, that’s what it is, tired. She looks like she doesn’t want life anymore. Surely, I’m not the sole person who created this.

“Paula, it was never my intention to do this to you. You have to believe me”, I say.

“You know that I’ve known about you since you and Leruo met and fucked in Italy, right?” She says.

She notices the shock on my face.

“Leruo has been talking about marrying you since he heard that you were pregnant. I know about your secret holiday trips with your son and all of that. Unlike you, he didn’t respect me enough to hide whatever was going on between the two of you. I knew everything and he is the one who told me”, she says.

I am very confused.

“Paula, I-

“Nomzamo, me being here has got nothing to do with you. Me being at this point in my marriage, has got nothing to do with you. Leruo knows the role that he played in getting me here and I hate that he is making you wear the burden for it. This is all him, not you. Don’t let him make you take the fall for this shit“, she says.

I nod my head.

“He loves you, Paula. He doesn’t want to lose you. I don’t want him to lose you. It doesn’t make him happy”, I say.

She looks at me, shaking her head, then says, “Is that what he told you?”

“Yes”, I lie. “And I see it too. He hasn’t been okay since he heard that you were in here”, I say. This part is true.

“Did he tell you that he beats me?” She says.

Now, I’m really shocked. Leruo? He is not the beating up type. Paula can see my facial expressions. I am shocked. I am confused. I hate to say this, but I don’t believe her.

She lifts her t-shirt that she is wearing and I see the bruises. I stand up. I walk around the table. She just looks at me. She actually feels sorry for me.

“Sit down, Zamo. Let’s talk”, she says when she sees how much I’m panicking now.

I sit down.

“Leruo has been cheating on me even before we got married. I think he only married me because I got pregnant. But it’s never been a happy marriage. There has been cheating like you’ll never believe. At times, he would beat me up too. But we don’t talk about these things because they could cost him his career and my kids would just have that nasty label that attaches them to a wife-beater. So, I endure. I take the beating and cry myself to sleep while he makes headlines about being the superstar and caring husband that he is. Even my friends don’t know. When he started seeing you, I was scared for you because you, like me, got pregnant and he started talking marriage. I thought you’d be another me – stuck because this is the father of your child. But, he seems different with you. Maybe you’ll have better luck than I did”, she says.

I am actually crying now. I cannot believe this. She holds my hand.

“I want to divorce him. I want you to convince him to let me go”, she says.

“Paula, I can’t do that”, I say.

“You have to. What do you think he is going to do to me when I come back from this place? He is going to kill me. I have children, Zamo. They need me. I need you to do this for me. Please”, she says.

She is so cold as she says this. Clearly, she has no emotions left inside of her anymore.

“A divorce will cause him a lot of scandal. He is Leruo Tloung after all. You can assure him that I won’t talk. I haven’t even told Renay and Thuli about this. I’m only talking to you. But I can ruin him. The only reason I haven’t ruined him yet is because he has kids. His kids don’t deserve this.” She says.

“Is this still fixable?” I ask her.

She shakes her head.

“I’m done”, she says.

I nod my head. I need to pull myself together. Renay and Thuli are walking back towards me.

“I’ll come see you again tomorrow. Is there anything you’d like me to bring for you?” I say.

Renay and Thuli are shocked. Paula smiles at me.

“Just yourself. You are not as bad as I thought you were”, she says.

We both chuckle.

“Okay, well I’ll be on my way out. Have a good one ladies.” I say.

I stand up, hug Paula and make my way back to my car.

As soon as I get to my car, I just fall apart.

I drive off from the centre and instead of heading home, I just find myself taking a long and well-needed drive. Leruo is abusive? How?! Why?! I don’t understand. 

I finally get home and make my way to the bedroom. I know that Leruo is with his dad and his uncle at a business meeting. He is injured from playing soccer and he is out for the season. I don’t understand why he doesn’t retire. He’s not as young as he used to be. Tee-le has retired. Yaya is retiring at the end of the season. Shack turned down his contract in the Premier League because Renay is kind of done with him. But he’s not even performing like he should be performing for the salary that he is being paid. There are talks about letting him go before his contract ends – that, or that he will bench for most of the season. 

I get into bed and try to wrap my mind around everything that Renay told me. Leruo tries to phone me, but I don’t answer the call. I think I just need space. I need to take in what has been said. I’m now thinking about the times that he has been rough with me a few times. He never hit me. But he has forcefully had sex with me when I told him I didn’t feel like having sex at the time. And he actually swore at me while we had that painful and forced sex because I had suggested that we could have the sex in the morning and not that night as I was really tired from work. I didn’t read much into it. He was angry and I thought that he possibly used me as his outlet. But I did wake up bruised the next day. 

Then there were times when he has been rough with me. There was a time when we were arguing in the car and he pushed me out of a moving car. Again, I thought he was just responding to a reflex that he had out of frustration. I didn’t think that he was being abusive. He strangled me against a wall once when I broke up with him because I was tired of being his mistress. He has always made sure that I had sex with him every time that we took our son on holiday or every time he came to see our son. No matter how much I told him that our relationship was done, he found a way to remind me that I owe him. One time I asked him what it is that I owed him because I’ve always been comfortable. I’ve never needed his money. He told me I owed him because he made me a mother – he made me a real woman. I don’t understand why I never saw the abuse in this. I don’t get it. Clearly his crash-course was Paula. He did the obvious abusing with her – the beating part of it. With me, he became more strategic and manipulative. I’m his advanced course. What the hell have I got myself into? Yoh! 

…

I’m finally home. Though, my place does not feel like home without Phatsima. It’s been a year since she left and I’m still struggling to call this place a home without her. I wish I could call Yaya just to talk. But, Ndalo will murder me. I feel so alone. Phathudi stayed in Bethlehem. I guess he had to go back to his wife and kids. I gave up everything for Yaya and now I’m alone. If this is payback for what I’ve done to Thuli, then honestly, it’s hurtful. Since that girl left Yaya’s life, there’s been a hex over my life while her life became everything it wouldn’t have become had she stayed with Yaya. I actually think that I did her a favour. So, why am I paying such a high price for just one mistake? I’d take it all back if it meant having my daughter back at least. 

I can’t stand to be in this house. Everything about this house reminds me of my child. I get dressed into a mini dress and make my way to a club. I just want to have sex and forget about everything that is happening. I go to a nice club in the suburbs. I’ve always wanted to go to this club. It seems nice and it seems like the club you go to when you are DTF.

I park my car then make my way inside the club. People are having fun and getting drunk. I buy myself a bottle of champagne then make my way to the VIP section. You pay a lot for this bottle shame – over and above the entrance fee you pay at the gate. But hey, it is one of those Zithulele Khuzwayo clubs. Partying here doesn’t come cheap. 

I settle at a couch by myself and pour myself a glass of champagne. 

After about thirty minutes of me just sitting here and taking everyone having fun on the dance floor and here at the VIP lounge, some guy sits next to me. 

“Hi”, he greets me. 

“Hello”, I say. 

“I’m Reitumetsi. But people call me Tumi. My brother-in-law owns this place.” He says.

“I’m Retshepile. But you can call me Tshepi for short.” I say.

“Why are you here all alone?” 

“Because I made a mistake that cost me everything. So, I just want to come out here, get drunk and have sex. I don’t want to feel alone.” I say.

“I like a woman that’s upfront about what she wants. It makes life easier for the rest of us.” 

“Why are you here alone?” 

“I just needed some air.” 

“From?”

“Something I don’t need to discuss with someone that I’m about to fuck.” 

I smile at him. 

I’m in the toilet of a club and this Tumi guy is giving it to me so good. I don’t want to stop. I don’t want him to stop. I could go all night if I could. But he does finish. And while I clean myself up, he offers to take me to somewhere nice. 

“Not a date, I hope.” I say. 

“I’m not trying to sweep you off your feet. So no, not a date.” He says. We laugh. 

He takes me to another floor in this club. We enter some weird place holding hands and people are smoking cocaine and doing some other drugs. This guy makes a R10 000 payment to enter this section of the club. Our cellphones are confiscated – hell, my entire handbag is confiscated. I’m given a gown and am told to undress my current dress and heels then get into the gown and slippers given to me that everyone here is actually dressed in. What the hell is going on in here? 

But I change. I don’t want to be alone today and I did leave my house with the intention to do what I’d never do on an ordinary night. 

Now I’m given champagne and a small packet of white stuff. 

Tumi leads me to a room. In this room, we smoke and have sex… literally. I’m high, drunk but still conscience. 

He’s having sex with me. Then some other men that I don’t even recognize come in and start having sex with me. I’m unable to fight them off. I’m unable to even say no. I don’t understand what’s happening to me. I feel paralyzed. Then one of these men sodomises me with a bottle of the champagne that I was drinking. I’m crying internally, but for some odd reason, what I’m feeling internally cannot be projected externally. Tumi leaves the room and he leaves me with these men who are now taking turns with me. They sometimes use some objects to force their way inside of me. But, someone gives me a drug through an injection and I pass out. 

I wake up in the morning and someone is still fucking me. But this time, I can respond. 

“I need to get home”, I say.

Okay, but I’m not strong yet. 

Ja no, I’m really being punished. Do I have to go and apologise to Thuli or something? 

“I’m almost done”, the man says. 

He pleases himself with my body then leaves the room. 

As weak as I am, I get off from this bed. I don’t see clothes anywhere – not even the gown I came in. I’m bleeding from my vagina. My body hurts. My vagina hurts so badly.

I find a bathroom. There are no mirrors, so I cannot see what I look like. There’s a shower here though, so I hop into that shower to clean all of this blood traced down my thighs. When I am done, I use a towel I see to dry myself up. I’ll lotion myself at home. I make my way to the place we entered. I get dressed in the dress that I came in last night. I’m given my bag and a goody bag. What the hell?! 

I just take them and leave the club. 

I feel AWFUL! 

I feel drunk! I feel high! I feel weak! I feel sick! 

I just need to get home. 

I manage to get into my car and start the engine. I start driving, but I’m driving at 20km/h. My head is spinning! My vision is blurry. But I’m close to home. I’m close. I’m getting closer and closer… 

***CRASH!****

…

“Are you coming to Fifi’s and Rea’s housewarming?” I text Khabane and ask him. 

“I’ll come if you want me to. They are not exactly my friends so I have no motivation to go there.” He texts me back. 

“I do want you to come. But my parents will be here, so we might not even be able to talk.” Me. 

“It’s your call. But tell me in time because it’s a few hours’ drive for me.” Him. 

“Aren’t your parents coming anyway?” Me. 

“I don’t know. They haven’t said anything to me.” Him. 

“I think I heard my sister saying that the Seetes were coming.” Me. 

“In that case, I’ll go sleep over at home tomorrow.” Him. 

I send him a thumbs up. 

Khabane and I do talk now. And the more I get to know him, the more I like him. But we are not dating. I made it very clear that I’m saving myself for umemulo and for marriage. He looked at me weird. I told him he doesn’t have to wait for me. He can see other people because he’s definitely not getting sex from me and I don’t want him to put pressure on me for sex. He asked me a million times if I’m sure. Of course, I’m not sure. But I won’t tell him that. I just want him to not make me make a decision that I’ll regret for the rest of my life because I wanted to keep him faithful to me. 

I hear arguing going on downstairs. I’m not sure what’s happening. I didn’t even know we had guests. The arguing doesn’t sound like it’s just between kazi and papa. 

I step out of my bedroom and I find my brothers at my door. 

“What’s going on?” I ask them. 

“Baba is here with some other woman and they are fighting with kazi.” Ranwedzi tells me. 

“Is it Latifah?” I ask them.

They shake their heads.

I pick Rendani up and hold Gundo’s hand. Ranwedzi is next to me. 

I get downstairs and I see baba, kazi, papa, latifah, gogo… and my biological mother. They all pause when they see me come down the stairs. I look at them, but focusing on my mom. I look at papa because his facial expression will tell me what I need to know. He looks stressed. He is looking at me with sad eyes as well. 

I focus back on my mother. 

“What are you doing here?” I ask her. 

“My beautiful baby girl. Hi. I’ve missed you so much.” She says. 

“What are you doing here?” I repeat my question. 

“Khanyi, your mother –

“Latifah, was I talking to you?!” How dare she. 

Latifah looks at baba. 

“Why are you here, Sibongile?” I ask my biological mother. 

She’s hurt that I’m calling her by name. 

“We need to talk, Khanyisa.” She says. 

“About?” I enquire. 

“I want you to come back and live with me. I’ve moved back home, le kwaMthaniya. I was struggling here. Nawe you know how I’ve been living and that’s why I allowed your father and Fikile to take you from me. But I went back home and I rebuilt my life. I’m married now. My husband owns livestock and we definitely live a better life. I’m his third wife and we have two kids together. But you have about twenty-one other siblings and – 

“It’s not happening, Sibongile. I’m not leaving with you.” I cut her right there. 

She looks at me. She takes a deep breath then she says, “I know I can’t give you bonke lobukhazikhazi, but Khanyi –

“It’s not about ubukhazikhazi! I understand that you struggled and you couldn’t afford to take care of me. But kazi took me. I don’t remember you even phoning me to check up on how I was doing. And before you tell me that you didn’t have airtime, you had airtime to ask me for money every other day. And when I phoned you just to check up on you, you’d be nowhere to be found… until you needed money of course.” 

Kazi’s face!!!! 

I didn’t tell her about that. Only Fifi knew. Papa is holding kazi back because she will pop off. 

“I’m not perfect, Khanyi. But I’m trying. And I need you.” 

“You need me to do what?”

Silence. 

“Baba, what is Sibongile doing here?” Now I address my father.

“Not only have you been inconsiderate to my feelings and how I’d receive this, but you’ve also disrespected kazi and papa – the parents that actually raised me – by bringing this woman here to suddenly claim that uyangizala.” 

“I got home and I found her there. Latifah fetched her because she felt that you needed a relationship with your mother.” Baba says. 

I should’ve known! 

“Okay… so I’m going to make this easy and fast for everyone… Sibongile, as a consenting adult, I’m not going anywhere with you. My guardians – my actual parents, kazi and papa – they will not let you take me anywhere. Please disappear just like you’ve been disappeared all this time. I don’t want a relationship with you. I don’t ever want to hear from you again. Enjoy your life with whoever you live with now because even now, you are not here as my mother. You are here as this crazy woman’s strategy to remove me from my father’s life. And instead of protecting me from that, you play along. You’ve always failed me as a mother and you continue to fail me as a mother with flying colours. Please leave and never return again – not just to this house, but to my life too.” 

“Khanyisa – 

“Papa, please take me to my sister. She’s expecting me.” 

Then I head to the garage. 

I hear Rendani saying, “Leave my sister alone!” 

It actually makes me laugh and I was on the brink of crying.

“Rendani, go to the car with your sister”, I hear papa saying. 

Kazi and papa come to the car after about twenty minutes. I did see baba’s car leaving too. 

We drive out and head to Fifi’s place. 

“Khanyi, why didn’t you tell me that Sibongile was phoning you?” Kazi asks me.

“She didn’t deserve for you to be stressing about her, kazi.” I say. 

“Khanyi, you are my child. I don’t want you feeling like you have to protect me. Things like that should never be on your shoulders, Khanyisa.” She says. 

“I’m sorry, kazi.” I say. 

“No, don’t apologise. Just promise me that you’ll never take such things into your own hands ever again. You are my child, Khanyisa. That’s all I’m saying. You don’t go through anything on your own. That’s all I’m saying.” 

I’m quiet now. 

I see papa looking back at me. Kazi is the one that’s driving. I don’t why he’s letting her drive. She’s too angry and she’s driving fast. 

Papa’s phone rings. 

He looks at it. He answers it. His phone is connected via Bluetooth. 

“Hello”. Papa. 

“Thomas, mfowethu. Can we talk?” Baba. 

“Sure.” 

“I’m sorry about tonight. I just – 

Kazi hangs the phone up. 

Eish. 

I really didn’t want kazi and Baba to fight. It’s the last thing I wanted. Honestly. I must fix this. Latifah deserves to die.

…