I’ve never been lucky with managers. Yho, Pearl. How does Lydia sleep with this woman’s man? She is so vicious. That’s probably why she doesn’t have kids. She is the type that can make a baby cry by just saying “thula nana“. Ngeke! But hey, it’s this or being fired. Mr Ramaru made that very clear. Mr Msomi is still on leave since his daughter’s passing. But he will be back tomorrow and I think I’ll have a nicer time working with him than Pearl. Even his PA says he is a nice boss and he is not easily bullied. 

I have been working since 7am. Pearl WhatsApps me every ten minutes. When I take longer than three minutes to reply to her WhatsApp messages, she phones me and asks what I am doing during her time. 

Can you ever?!

She gives me work to do in the morning and will want it before lunch. Then anything that comes in after lunch has to be done by close of business. 

Her PA, Thando, tells me that it gets worse when she and Mr Ramaru are fighting. She over-compensates and works as if she fears being fired by Mr Ramaru. 
Today, we are suffering because Mr Ramaru left her out of a board meeting and never even sent her the PowerPoint presentation deck that was presented at the meeting. Yho yho yho, we are seeing our asses today. 

My family is much better from this Covid thing and to be honest with you, I am so relieved. I don’t know how I was going to be able to look after them with Pearl up my ass. I work in the kitchen because this is the only place with a table. Pearl sent a printer to be delivered to me because I kept complaining about needing to go to the internet Cafe every time I needed to print. She is hectic this one. 

Thando phones me. 
“Hi Thando”, I answer my phone. 
“Hey. Listen, I’m sending you a contract that Pearl wants you to go through. Just highlight all the things that indicate when and how we can exercise our rights to fire someone”, she says.
“Shouldn’t a lawyer be doing that? How am I supposed to know how to do that?” I ask her. I mean really. 
“Eish. Never mind”, she says then hangs up. 

Heh banna! 

My phone rings again. This time it’s Pearl. 
“Hi Mrs Ramaru”, me. 
“How did you say you got this job again?” She asks me. 
I actually don’t know what to say, so I freeze. 
“Hello?” Her. 
“I’m still here.” Me. 
“Are you going to answer my question?” She says. She sounds very pissed off. 
“Mr Ramaru said you needed extra hands for admin, so I volunteered”, I say. That’s the safest thing to say right now.
“Who interviewed you?” She asks me. 
“Mr Ramaru”, I say.
“Why?” Her. 
“Excuse me?” Me. 
“We have an entire team of HR professionals. You are a mere warehouse employee. Why would he look through the headcount report and spot you to interview and assign to me? Any special qualifications that I need to know about?” She says. 
“No ma’am”, I say. 
“Why did he choose you? It cannot be because of your outstanding performance because from what I understand, you are quite the problem”, she says. 
I actually don’t know what to say. Is she even allowed to do this to me? 
“So what can you do besides copy and paste what I send to you and tell you to put on paper?” She says. 
This woman guys, this woman! 
“I’m excited to learn more about – 
The line goes dead. 

…

I hope that today is a better day. I wish we were at the office so that I could at least make her coffee and have a do over. But I am up and I am already online, waiting for my first order of the day. 
I get a call from one of the new recruits in management. 
“Hello?” I answer my phone. 
“Hello. I was told that you could help me. I will be forwarding you an email of all the documents that I need. I need them within the next ten minutes”, he says. His accent is very thick. He sounds Spanish. 
“Okay sir”, I say.
“I also need the system updated with a few details of the new businesses that we have just received. Please make sure that’s done by lunch time”, he says. 
“Okay sir”, I reply. 
He just hangs up without saying goodbye. 

Something weird is happening in that company. Everyone is just rude and tense. Everyone is stressed. No one is nice. I refuse to believe that people are like this in real life. 

I get a call from Pearl. 
“Are you crazy? Are you stupid? Which version of special are you? You uploaded the system with the wrong damn information! What the hell wenaPortia! If I don’t fire you by the end of today, it will be a miracle. Fix this bloody mess, you little shit!” 
Who the hell does this woman think she is? No! Never! Nobody talks to me like that! No one! 
“Mrs Ramaru – 
“Don’t Mrs Ramaru me! You are useless!” She says. 
“This is why Mr Ramaru cheated on you! You are an angry, bitter and rude woman! To think I used to feel sorry for you. Now that I know how little regard you have for people and just how rude you are, you deserve everything that is coming your way.” I say. 
She is quiet. There is literally silence over the phone. After what seems to be a few moments, she finally says, “You are fired, Portia. I will have someone come pick up company property from your house.” 
She hangs up. 
This cannot be happening. I cannot be fired. I need this job. 

I try to call Lydia. I know I have annoyed her and she is probably a fewmoments away from blocking me, but I need her to pull strings again and save my job. She does not answer her phone. I keep calling her, but she does not answer the phone.
I am panicking now. What can I do? 

I play the last card that I have left to play. 
I phone Mr Msomi on Microsoft Teams. Good! He’s available. 
“Yes?” He answers immediately. 
“Mr Msomi, I’ve been assigned to assist you and your PA with some admin work”, I say. 
“Assigned by whom?” He asks me. 
“Mr Ramaru”, I say. 
“Why would Thomas be doing HR work?” He says. 
I hate this question with all of my heart. 
“Sir, I really just want to do my job, please let me”, I say. 
“Okay, please talk to my PA. She will tell you all that needs to be done.” He says then ends the call. 
Indeed I call his PA. She is nice. She even takes the time to teach me how to operate the system and how to structure various documents. She takes me through an administration lesson and I like her. She and Mr Msomi are nothing like Pearl and Thando. 

When Sli and I are done, I start my work. The people who have to come and fetch my stuff that belongs to the company have not arrived and it’s 7pm. 
I shall continue my work tomorrow with Mr Msomi. 
…

Day two of working with Mr Msomi is still great, but I do fear Pearl walking into my yard and taking the laptop and printer. 

Today, Mr Msomi invited Sli and I to his house to work from there. This house is out of this world. It is so big and it is so nice. Sli is already sitting at a dining table and is already working. She is very comfortable so clearly she has been here before. 

“Good morning. My name is Dikeledi. Can I get you something to drink?” Thedomestic worker asks me. I can tell that she is a domestic worker by the outfit that she is wearing. It is the classic domestic worker outfit. I feel weird about ordering this lady around. She seems to be around my age. But I suppose this is her job and I shouldn’t feel bad. Pearl and her likes don’t feel bad when they are rude as hell towards us. 
“Just coffee please”, I say. 
“Black? With milk? Or with cream?” She asks me. 
Cream? Rich people have coffee with cream? Rich people don’t know what to do with money yaz. Cream is so expensive. But anyway, let me sound rich and sound like I’m used to these things. 
“With cream please, lots of cream”. 
She nods her head then leaves me. 

I go to the table where Sli is sitting at and I set up. 
“Good morning”, I greet her. 
“Hey babe. You good?” She asks me. 
I did get driven here, picked up from my house and I’m about to have coffee with a lot of cream for the first time. Honey, I’m great! 
“I’m good babe. Self?” Me. 
“I’m well thanks. Mr Msomi should be here in the next hour. In the meantime, let’s get started on these.” She says, giving me some paperwork. She talks me through what we need to do. She then talks me through uploading data on a system that is used to upload data relating to sales. 
I love how she takes her time with teaching me. God bless her. Honestly. 

The domestic worker drops off my coffee and hot water with lemon, I guess that’s for Sli. She sees me looking at the drinks then says, “I’m getting fat by day with this pregnancy. I can’t wait to pop this child and lose all my baby fat. I can see that my husband is too scared to tell me how big I am getting”. 
I actually didn’t even notice that she is pregnant. She looks beautiful, honestly. 
“But you look stunning”, I say. 
“I don’t feel stunning at all.” She says. 
“Is this your first child?” I ask her.
“My second and my last”, she says. 
“I have four”, I say. 
Her eyes almost pop out of her face. I laugh.
“Why?” She asks me, sincerely concerned. 
“I’m a married woman who has a lot of sex and is barely on contraceptives”, I say. 
She laughs. Good, I made her laugh. 
“Well, please don’t fall pregnant in the next year. You will be doing my work while I’m on maternity leave. When I get back, the two of us can’t make Mr Msomi sign off maternity leave again”, she says. 
We both giggle. 
“Where is he? Isn’t this his house?” I ask. 
She looks around then says, whispering really, “At his girlfriend’s house. He just works here, but he spends a lot of time at her house. I just ordered a bunch of roses to be delivered to her.” 
“Isn’t he married?” I ask.
“Isn’t Ramaru married? But his girlfriend is pregnant with his child”, she says. 
WHAAAAAAT?! Lydia is pregnant? I never! 
“I don’t know how I feel about all this. I am a married woman, you know”, I say. 
“It is unsettling. Mr Msomi seems to be in love with this girlfriend of his. There used to be girls in the past, but they were never serious. This one seems serious and she has been around for over three months now. From what I’ve also seen, Msomi is about to divorce his wife”, she says. 
“Because of his side piece?” I ask. What the hell? 
“She’s probably ten percent of the reason. But those two have bigger issues than the girlfriend. But hey, we just set up lawyer meetings, block calls and maintain his privacy. Which reminds me, please sign this NDA”, she says. 
“NDA?” I enquire. 
“It’s a contract that states you may not discuss or share any information regarding what we do in Mr Msomi’s office and what we know about his personal life. If you do, even with your husband, you will be fired with immediate effect and Mr Msomi will be well within his rights to sue you”, she says. 

That time I was really looking forward to spilling this tea to my husband tonight. Rich people are scandalous I tell you. Scandalous! I sign the NDA then Sli and I chat about as we do our work for another hour. Mr Msomi finally arrives at 9am. 

“Ladies”, he walks up to us and says. 
“Good morning sir”, Sli says.
“You must be Portia”, he says looking at me and extending his hand to shake mine. 
“I am sir.” I say, shaking his hand. 
“Are you settling in well?” He asks me. 
“Yes sir”, I say. 
“I hear Pearl fired you and Miles is fighting everyone and anyone that you left with headcount”, he says. 

It is hard to read him. I don’t know if he is about to tell me to sort myself out or if he has handled it. I will say though, he is charming as hell. 

Pearl and Miles are trying to ruin me. 
“Are you going to be a problem, Portia? Am I shooting myself in the foot if I fight for you to stay here?” He asks me. 
“No sir. I won’t disappoint you, I promise”, I say. 
“Portia, I’m a busy man. I’m too busy to be micromanaging anyone. I expect things to be done when they need to be done. I don’t have the luxury of running after people and telling them to do their work. Miles didn’t have nice things to say about your performance, neither did Pearl. I have absolutely no reason to fight for you as a resource and Thomas has explained to me how you ended up in my office”, he says. 
This is not going well at all. 
“Mr Msomi, since she started working with me, I haven’t seen signs of non-performance. This is a career change for her and Portia is willing to learn. She learns fast and she applies herself. She will actually be ready to do my work when I go on my maternity leave. I vote that we give her a chance”, Sli. 
Mr Msomi looks at me. My hands are sweaty. 
“Fine. Call Jeff so that he can sort out your contract, payment and this headcount shit that I dont ever want to be ambushed with ever again”, he says.
“I’m on it sir”, Sli says. 
I love this girl. I love her. 
“Blake passed away this morning in ICU”, he says. I don’t know who that is, but I figure it’s one of our senior people. Sli seems quite upset, as if ready to cry. 
“Yeah, this Covid is finishing us”, he says. 
I hold onto my chest. My family are the lucky few who recovered. 
“His job will be advertised sometime next week. We think Palesa will probably apply for his role, but until the role is filled, I will be taking over his work. So make nice with his PA, Palesa and Lydia. Especially Lydia. That girl is very knowledgeable. We need to keep her close. She will also be going on maternity leave in a couple of months so Portia, I’m counting on you to gather enough information to make sure we can keep the ship sailing. I’ll do the work and I’ll work closely with her. But as far as support is concerned, I need you on board. You will be seeing a lot of Pearl but please, no cat fighting in my house.” He says. 

Sli is just taking notes. I feel like I should be taking notes too. 
“I’ll set up in my office upstairs. Thomas, Pearl and Palesa are on their way.” He says. 
He smirks at me. 
Sli giggles.
“No drama”, he says. 
“Promise”, I say. 

Mr Msomi leaves us. Sli and I set up in the cottage for their meeting. This place already looks like some office space. We set up placing water, keeping social distance and connecting to the 55 inch monitor so whoever wants to present can present. I do most of the work because Sli cannot exactly carry boxes of water and move around heavy stuff. Dikeledi is helping us move things around. She seems irritated by something. I did pick up that there is a weird energy between her and Mr Msomi. How does anyone have issues with such a nice man? 

When we are done, we go back to the main house where we were stationed. Jeff is there with Mr Msomi discussing something. I hear my name come up a lot, so I assume it’s my contract and new offer. 
“Portia, join us”, Mr Msomi says. 
Jeff hands me some papers. My old HRBP is also here. This cow wanted to give me a mutual separation agreement because Miles didn’t like me. I will never forgive her for that and she knows it. Mr Msomi signs a document. I trust him,so I just sign too. I just know that my salary has doubled. This is going to go a long way. I really am happy here. 

After Jeff and that witch leave, Mr Ramaru, Pearl and Palesa walk in. Sli tells them that they should go to the cottage and she leads them there. They do not greet us. They are just quiet and come across as rude, honestly. Thank God that Pearl doesn’t know what I look like. This would have been a shit show. Two more people come in. They look at me, no hello, nothing. I assume they are here for the meeting as well. 

…

I go home at 6pm. The car that brought me here takes me back home. I am exhausted, but I am happy. I have an increase and I am not paying for transport. I must thank Sli and Lydia for this. I’ll throw them a baby shower and get them something nice. 

When I get home, my daughter has cooked and my husband is watching television. I sit next to him. When I try to kiss him, he pulls away from me. 
Okay? 
Things are finally going well at work and he is sour? What’s his issue? 
“I paid lobola for you, not our daughter. I expect you to cook in this house, look after the baby and make sure that I am happy.” He says. 
I don’t believe this. I thought this side of him had changed. 
“But you know how stressful things have been for me at work. I finally have moved to a team where things are going to be easier and you have a problem with that?” I ask him. 
“Portia, you are a wife first. You don’t get picked up by some car at 6am for work”, he says. 
“You’d rather I catch a bus at 6am instead?” I raise my voice. I don’t need this shit. 
I get up and make my way to the room. 

I hear the door close behind me and yes, I get a beating for my disobedience as a wife. It has been years since I got this beating, but clearly it’s back. This side of my husband is back just when things are coming right at work.