So here we are today on a yacht ride in Mathoanapo. Ruri suggested this place for us to go and enjoy ourselves for today. Apparently, her mother gifted her and her man an all expenses paid weekend away to Mathoanapo to just connect. They couldn’t really do a lot because they had to leave prematurely. So today, in the spirit of hosting Pat and Yolanda (his girlfriend), we are here. We will be here until late afternoon because this evening, we are watching a film under the stars. Pat is here with Yoli. Ruri is here with Khanya. Zaza is also here with her man, Molise. They brought their two kids with them, which we don’t mind. And I’m here with Mnqobi. Lol! Mnqobi neh… 
I know I owe you a whole page about this one, so here it goes. 

It turns out that in Patrick’s very twisted way of trying to distract me from what has been happening with Wandile, he set me up with Mnqobi. Apparently, Mnqobi has had a crush on me since he first saw me when he and Pat were at UCT. I don’t even remember this guy. But when I asked him why he chose to go to UCT when Tholoana Kingdom’s tertiary education system is the best of the best on this continent, he told me that he just needed to leave the kingdom for a while and breathe a different kind of air. So anyway, Pat told him to make me laugh for a few weeks and co-host him and Yoli with me. And Mnqobi is actually nice. He’s very nice to look at. He has these diamond earrings – and you can tell that the value is nothing less than R250 000… the cut of these diamonds is tops. He’s deliciously tall. And he’s actually funny. I asked him why at his grown age, he’s a man who wears earrings. He told me that it’s a thing between him, his father and his brother. He actually showed me a picture of the three of them together and I felt like I was looking at one person in three different ages. And yes, they all have these diamond earrings on both ears. 
He also showed me pictures of his daughter. Yes, he has a child. A whole ten year old that he made quite early in his life. Apparently, the child lives with the mother. She visits him and his family two weekends in a month. But he takes care of the child’s education and medical bills. The rest, the mother makes a plan. She’s some actress that’s well-known here in the kingdom. I’ve also seen her on TV. When he told me who she is, I realised that this one has the potential to show me flames. He dates up-there celebrities. Who is Wehweh in the bigger scheme of things? She’s been in international films and series. She’s currently married to a soccer player who plays for NFR. They have kids together. I thought the three kids they flaunt all over social media are theirs. But they have three kids together. The fourth child – who is the eldest – is Mnqobi’s child. But it’s good that the stepdad flaunts her like she’s his own. Clearly, he loves her and creates a healthy environment for her. I get the feeling that Mnqobi doesn’t like that because he keeps emphasising that his daughter knows who her father is. Also, I came to Tholoana Kingdom to get with a Mosotho man. Why am I out here liking a Zulu man? I could’ve gone to KZN for that. When I said this to Mnqobi, he told me that his mother is very Sotho… apparently she’s Sotho enough for everyone in their house. I laughed at this.

We are now in bikinis and lazying on this yacht with sunglasses. Zaza’s kids are enjoying the pool on this yacht, especially the older one. 
“You good?” Mnqobi asks me. 
I’m busy putting sunscreen on my chunky calves and thighs. I literally go to the gym for leg day just to keep my legs toned because I have big thighs and big calves. If they are not toned, I’ll look like an elephant. 
“I’m good. Wena? Is everything sorted from that important call that you had to take?” Me.
“I was talking to my dad. He just needed me to guide him to finding a few documents that he needed for a business that he runs with my brother and I.”
He really doesn’t have to explain. But I appreciate that he believes that I’m worth an explanation.
“Oh okay.” I say.
“Do you need help with whatever you are doing there?” 
“I’m just putting sunscreen on my body. I don’t want to get sun-burned.”
“Ja, let me put some on your back. Or you don’t mind if your back gets sunburned?”
I just giggle. Then I put some sunscreen on his hands and he lotions my back, giving me a nice massage lapho.
“You really know how to give a good massage.”
“I aim to please.” Him.
“So, you haven’t told me where you work and what line of work you do.” I say.
“You never asked. It’s not like I go around making an announcement about what I do for a living.”
“Well I’m asking now.”
He is silent for a moment, as if contemplating if he should be honest with me about what he really does. Then he says, “I own about three clubs with my brother and my father. Then I own two bottle stores, in the process of buying two more. So I suppose one could say that I’m into business”, he says.
“That’s nice. Have you always wanted to be in business or?”
“I grew up around a lot of entrepreneurs. It’s almost as if they were telling me that being an employee is not an option.” 
He’s finally done massaging my back with sunscreen. He comes around to sit next to me, lifting my legs then putting them on his lap. 
“You do know that I want to see where this could go, right?” He says to me. 
“Me too”, I say.
“So, can we just do the right thing? Ngicela ungiqome”, he says.
I giggle. 
“Can you be a little more romantic tu.” I say.
“Ngiyenzeni? Get everyone here to sing for you? Beg you for me? Maybe drown in this large body of water just to show you that I’d cross the ocean for you?” 
The way I’m laughing.
I’m laughing quite hard right now, but he’s as serious as can be. He massages my feet then says to me, “Nomawethu, I’m not a romantic man. At all. I’ll do nice things for you, but I don’t know if they are romantic. I’ll love you with everything that’s inside of me, understanding your love language and trying my best to make sure that I meet you there. Ngizohlala ngithembekile kuwe ngazo zonke izinkathi. I’ll be a good man to you. I just cannot promise you that I’ll be romantic. I’ve googled what romantic is because I honestly don’t get it. Google says that being romantic is expressing love. But it says nothing about the shit we see on TV. So I’ll express my love to you. I hope that’s romantic to you.”
He actually googled what romantic is?! Hai bo, this guy! 
But I get up then make my way to sitting on his lap. His eyes follow me from when I get up from where I’m sitting right up until I’m on his lap. I brush his face then peck his lips. He’s still looking at me. 
“I promise to be faithful to you at all times. Ngizohlala ngithembekile kuwe at all times. I promise to be understanding when I need to be, but to also be aggressive when the need arises. Whether I’m understanding or aggressive, I want you to know that my intentions will always be honest and I’ll be loving you through it all.” 
He smiles at me.
“That’s the most romantic thing anyone has ever said to me”, he says to me.
Mxm.
We both just laugh.
“Ey, there are kids here, nina!” Khanya says to us. Ruri is next to him. 
By the way.
I climb off Mnqobi then sit next to him again. Khanya and Ruri sit next to us.

“Are the two of you together now?” Ruri asks us with a huge smile on her face.
We smile at her – especially Mnqobi.
“Phela I need to know if I need to start telling Aunt Tlali that she’s finally got a decent daughter-in-law to look forward to.” Ruri says.
Mnqobi laughs then says, “Ey, that aunt of yours.”
“You can’t blame her though, Mnqobi. You’ve brought in a fair share of traumatising nonsense in the past and called it your girlfriends.” 
I laugh.
“I take it I’m an upgrade?” I say.
“A significant one.” Ruri.
The other two couples join us. Zaza and Molise are drying their kids with towels as they sit with us.
“So Yolanda, how did you and Pat meet?” I ask.
She’s a really pretty girl. She’s quiet – well, around us. I think she’s a bit nervous and we’ve been bending over backwards to make her feel comfortable. 
“I’m a bank teller. I didn’t really have the funds to go to tertiary, so I worked in retail post matric then ended up in the bank.” She says.
“Do you enjoy your work though?” Zaza.
“It’s better than retail stores. The hours are better. But it’s more tense. It’s a bank, you know. And it pays the bills. So, you learn to enjoy it.” She says.
“How did you meet Pat?” Ruri. 
“We met at a club.” She says. But she’s weird about it. Pat also hasn’t told me this, so I want to know. Mnqobi is already laughing while caressing my hip as he has his arm around my waist. I look at Mnqobi. Uhlekani? 
“Guys, stop harassing my girlfriend. What’s wrong with you? What’s with the interview?” Pat says, but he’s also giggling like a little girl.
Ruri, Zaza and I look at each other. Khanya is not even looking at us. Clearly, he’s in on the story too. And Molise. He keeps talking to his kids, pretending like he’s not part of this conversation. 
“You told them?!” Yolanda is suddenly upset. 
“Mnqobi was there. And we were just discussing how far you and I have come. Molise and Khanya were there and they support us. They also believe that you and I are not making a mistake”, Pat is not convincing at all.
I decide to read the room… as pressed as I am to know the story behind this story, I decide to say, “we don’t have to talk about it. It’s okay.” 
Ruri and Zaza look at me as if saying, “Hai wena! Speak for yourself.” 
But it’s an awkward ride until we get to our destination. 

It is 6pm when we arrive at our destination. It’s a stunning picnic setup. They are selling food and drinks here. We have snacks with us. We will be watching a movie under the stars today.
The guys are pumping up our inflatable couches that we brought with us while us ladies get food and drinks. 
Yolanda looks a bit down.
“You good?” I ask her.
She nods her head.
“Lalela, the only person that matters here is Pat. If he likes you, then the rest of us are irrelevant. Please don’t feel like making an impression on us is what is important. Pat brought us together because he wants you to know the people that are in his life. It’s wrong of us to make you feel uncomfortable in anyway. And if we’ve done that in anyway, ngiyaxolisa. Truly. From the bottom of my heart, I’m so sorry.”
She hugs me then says, “Pat did say that you are a good person. I agree with him. You are really cool. And I’m sorry about Wandile.”
So Pat can discuss my business with her but their business about how they met is none of my business?!
She sees that I’m irritated.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t realise that it was still a no-go area of discussion”, she says.
I walk to the guys. I just hear Zaza say, “Wenzeni?!” 
Now they come after me. 
“You discuss my business with Yolanda now?!” I aggressively ask Pat.
“Yeh?!” Him.
“Why is Yolanda telling me that she’s sorry about Wandile?! What does she know about Wandile?!” Me.
“Hai bo! We just discussed what happened and –
“For what?! Why are you discussing my business with your girlfriend?! How dare you!” 
“Wehweh, I’m sorry. It was never my intention to hurt you, ntwana. Askies. We were honestly discussing this innocently, genuinely concerned. Besingakuhlebi. I’m sorry if you feel ukuthi i was out of line. I’m really sorry”, he sincerely says.
“You of all people know why this is not breaking news for the world to know. Yolanda is nothing to me. She has no business knowing my business and having that kind of access to me or my life.” I’m actually still very upset.
“Wehweh, I’m sorry.” Pat says, pulling me into a hug this time. I just breathe.

I’m cuddled into Mnqobi’s arms as the movie is about to start. We are sitting on our inflatable couch. We have a blanket over us. He’s drinking beer with his meal. I’m having white wine with my meal. I’m still quite upset. 
“Yehlisa umoya, Nomawethu.” He says. 
“Ngiyazama“, I say.
I start feeling his hand on my boob. 
I look at him. 
“Yehlisa umoya“, he says, warning me that if I don’t calm down, his hand will do more. His sly smile is what’s melting me the most. 
I’m relaxing. 
The movie is a good two hours and it’s actually nice. Mnqobi is on his phone though, texting away. He’s not making an effort to hide his screen, so I read the conversation. 

Lindi: “I know next weekend is your weekend with Sasi, but Banks is headed to Spain with NFR for a tournament. He asked that we all go with him. Can Sasi please come with us? When we return, you can have her for 4 consecutive weeks.”
Sasi is his daughter. Banks is the husband to the baby-mama. Sasi is short for Sasihle from “Sasihle isandla sikaJehova”. I got goosebumps too when he told me. The depth! Apparently, Mnqobi’s mother named her. If she has such stunning names in her pocket, she can name all my kids – even if Mnqobi and I break up. 
Also, baby-mama seems very mature. I think I like her. 
Mnqobi: “My mom wanted to take her to some granny-and-me event that Aunt Tebza is hosting on behalf of the royal house. But I’m sure she will understand. When will you guys be back?” 
Lindi: “Thank you. I appreciate your consideration. We will be away for two weeks. If they make it through to semi-finals and finals, it will be three weeks.“
Mnqobi: “Okay. All the best to him. Do you need anything from me for Sasi before you leave?” 
Lindi: “All is good. Just a quick convo though…“
Mnqobi: “???” 
Lindi: “I believe you are seeing someone.”
How does she know that? Mnqobi and I just started vibing and I only agreed to being his girlfriend today. Or is he seeing someone else? 
Mnqobi: “Yes I am. So?” 
Lindi: “Is it serious?” 
Mnqobi: “Yes. Why are we having this conversation?” 
Lindi: “I’d like to meet her before you bring her around Sasi. I introduced Banks to you before introducing Sasi to him. When we broke up, it was inevitable that we would move on. But because we share a child, we still have to make sure that we are comfortable around the people we will bring into her life.“
Mnqobi: “Okay.”
Mnqobi is the worst person to send paragraphs to. Imagine after that entire conversation, all he sends is ‘okay’. 
Lindi: “Can we arrange before we leave for Spain?” 
Mnqobi: “I’ll speak to her and get back to you.“
She sends a thumbs up. 
I kiss my boyfriend  – attack him with a kiss actually. He happily kisses me back. 

–

We are in our hotel rooms now. We are sleeping then we are headed back to Taung tomorrow. It’s 11pm now. 
I’ve showered up and am in my pyjamas. Mnqobi is lying on the bed topless. 
“Tell me about this Wandile person”, he says.
Hai bo.
“Not this again”, I say.
He just looks at me. 
“Ufuna ngithini kuwe?” Me.
“I want to understand why I had to come help you get over a tough time because this person left your life. I want to understand why you took Pat and Yoli to task because they mentioned his name. And I want to know why Yoli is sorry about him.”
I look at him. 
He looks at me.
“He was my friend.” I say.
“What kind of friend?” 
“A close one. Our families know each other. We went to the same schools. We became really close. His girlfriend didn’t like us being friends. She thinks we were sleeping together. So we had to end a longterm friendship and it hurt.” 
“Have you guys ever fucked?” 
“No”.
“Kissed?”.
“No.”
“So what does your friendship entail exactly?” 
“Nothing physical.”
He’s silent for a brief second…
“So, what’s my job if you’ve already got a best friend in him?” He asks me.
“I can’t have two?”
“You going to fuck both of us too?”
“Mnqobi!”
“I’m asking valid questions here. I don’t understand this friendship of yours that only the two of you understand and I’m not comfortable with it.”
“Well, you’ve got nothing to worry about ke because we are not friends anymore.”
“And if he comes back athi you can be friends again?”
Silence.
“I asked you a question, Nomawethu.”
“How about you actually meet him first before you write him off? Uzobona nawe ukuthi there’s nothing there. We are just friends.” I suggest.
“Let’s look at the relationships around us… who is Molise’s female best friend and who is Zaza’s male best friend?” 
Silence.
“Who is Ruri’s male best friend or Khanya’s female best friend?” 
Silence.
“Yabona ukuthi le nto eyakho noWandile kuphela?”
Silence. 
“Fine, I’ll meet him.” He says.
“Ngempela?” I say, excited.
“Ja. And if I don’t like him, will you also do what he did? Cut him off for a man that you are with?” 
Yoh! 
“If that’s difficult for you to even comprehend, then I’d like to exit this relationship right now because what I will never do is compete with another man for my girlfriend.” He says.
I’m so shocked I look at him. 
“Why would you say that to me, Mnqobi? Yini? You already having second thoughts about being in a relationship with me?” 
“Uyaz kahle nje ukuthi that’s not what I’m saying. And I know ukuthi uyazi kahle nje ukuthi ngithini kuwe. I’m prepared to meet this friend of yours who means so much to you. But I should feel comfortable in my relationship with you. If I don’t feel comfortable, you shouldn’t be okay with that friendship.” 
I’m quiet.
“I know it’s a lot to think about. You can sleep on it.” After he says this, he turns the lights off. 
I’m just sitting here now. Is this guy being for real.
I don’t even attempt to sleep because I know that I will not be able to sleep. 
I just sit here…
In the dark…
And think…
Is there really something that wrong with my friendship with Wandile? Why are we the only two people that understand it? And would I be wrong or would I be letting my friend down if I chose my boyfriend over him? He did choose his girlfriend over me. Even though he has explained that it’s only temporary, he still broke up with his best friend for his girlfriend. And it should be okay. It is okay. We should respect the people that we are with and are trying to build with. But there’s also that small nyana fact yokuthi I did just meet Mnqobi and Wandile has been in my life since I was nine years old. 

“Mnqobi”, I begin, hoping that he’s not sleeping. 
No response. 
“Mnqobi”, me again. 
Nothing. 
I can’t wait until the morning. 
I shake him to wake him up. 
“Nomawethu, yin’ inkinga yakho?” 
So, he’s not sleeping. 
“Kulungile. If you don’t like him, our friendship is done.”
“Okay.”
“Okay? Seriously?!”
“What do you want me to say?”
“My friend of ten years is about to leave my life completely and all you can say is okay?!”
“Yerrrr!”
“Mnqobi!”
“Yey! Ngifuna ukulala mina! Awunginyobisi la. You are keeping me awake ukukhalela enye indoda?! Ung’jwayela kabi wena.” 
Now he pulls blankets over his head. I lie down to sleep too… crying though. 

The morning is weird. I know he’s up. I see him pacing around the bedroom. I’m pretending to still be asleep because I’m not ready to deal with him. 
His phone rings. 
He answers it. 
“Hi dad”, a cute voice says. It’s on speaker. 
“Sthandwa sami, Kunjani?”
“I’m fine. I phoned glammy and baba. They said you are not home. Where are you?”
“I’ve gone away with some friends, nana.”
“Okay. Mommy says we are going to Spain. Can me and you have an ice-cream date before I leave?” 
“Of course we can.”
“Will you fetch me?”
“I will, baby girl.”
“Okay. Well, thanks for phoning me and checking me. I love you.”
“I love you, my baby.”
That was such a sweet call.
He looks behind him, looking at me.
“I know you are awake”, he says.
I’m quiet. 
“We need to head back to Taung. Vuka ugeze.” He says.
I just wake up and shower. After last night, he needs some reminders of who I am.
I wear blue jeggings, a beige v-neck loose t-shirt and some sandals. I accessorise with a neckpiece, Earrings and a watch. I put on some makeup – foundation, eyeshadow and lipgloss, then make nice with my weave. It’s a microweave 

When I step back into the bedroom, he does look at me longer than he wants to. He’s trying very hard not to be led into temptation, but I am a pretty girl.
“Your daughter sounds like a stunner…” I say and he blushes.
“Plus, she has daddy wrapped around her little finger. I need to meet her so she tells me her secret”, me.
He laughs.
Thank God.
I smile at him.
“Ngiyaxolisa, babe.” I say.
He looks at me as if enquiring ukuthi what am I sorry for exactly.
“I’m sorry I’ve made you feel like Wandile is more important than you… he’s not. And I’m sorry I’ve made you feel as if my friendship with him is more important than my relationship with you… because it isn’t. It’s just something that’s been a large part of me for ten years and letting it go is difficult. It’s not that our relationship isn’t worth it… to be honest, it has nothing to do with any relationship or anyone for that matter. It’s just one of the healthiest relationships I’ve experienced in my life. I’m not exactly rich with those.”
“What do you mean by that?” He asks me.
I take a deep breath.
He leans against a wall in here and folds his arms, focusing on me. 
“My parents got a divorce when I was five years old. And it wasn’t an easy divorce. It was a horrible fight – legally and physically. I spent a substantial amount of time in court, not only watching my parents expose every single negative thing about each other to a judge just so they’d get custody of me, but also learning why love is not a good thing and how bad it can get. I never saw the beauty of love… ever. Once the court case was done and my father won custody because he fought the dirtiest, they both gave back to their careers and I pretty much raised myself, supported by staff that always surrounded me in my father’s house. Wandile became my friend in all of that. He was the first and only person I could really talk to about how I was feeling. No one was there for me to hear that. I had step siblings popping up from both parents, flaunting their new marriages in each other’s faces, but genuinely forgetting that I was still there and that I was hurting and that I had no idea what love is truly supposed to be. Wandile became my family. He became the only consistent person in my life. I think my parents also liked him because they knew I needed someone to hold my hand through the trauma that their divorce brought into my life. And he was that.”
He nods his head sincerely then says, “What’s your take on love now?”
“I’m still learning about its beauty. The guy I dated for years – probably the only boyfriend I ever had – took advantage of my brokenness. With everything that he put me through, I honestly could’ve come out of that relationship even more broken. But Wandile was there, Mnqobi… supporting me through the rubbish. Yaz while we were still together, he impregnated someone and paid lobola for her. Cabanga nje, I became his mistress in a split second after having been in a relationship with him for five years.”
“I’m sorry about that. I really am”, he says.
“I understand if I’m a lot to love. I’m going to make a lot of mistakes because I have an emotional jadedness inside of me. I don’t know how to fix me. Loving me requires patience – even when you don’t understand my emotional instability. If you’ll still have me, I’m apologising in advance for the emotional exercises that I’ll be putting you through. But I promise to try my best to learn everyday, to grow emotionally everyday… and to learn your love language so that you are just as loved in this relationship. I’m not completely broken.” 
Now I look at him.
He looks at me. 
He opens his arms to receive me in a hug. 
I walk to him and throw myself in his arms. 
He holds me tightly and I feel…
Safe. 
I’m also feeling emotional, and he lets me vulnerable with him. He seals the moment with a kiss on top of my head.