I am headed back to Gauteng today. But first, I had to come and see my wife. She has been gone for a month now and it has not got any better. The silence in my life is very loud without her. I miss her. I have brought Rofhi with me. I think she has been having dreams about her mother because twice, she woke up in the middle of the night screaming for her mother. I stand in front of her...
I wish I could tell her how blessed she is to have a man who loves her like this. He has made sure that she is well taken care of, no matter what may happen to him. He learned that he has cancer and he has refused to be released on medical parole or to take treatment. He wants to die in there and he wants Luthando to be well taken care of. He has even relieved me off the duty...
Luthando“I miss you every day. Those girls of yours are going out of their way to drive me crazy”, I tell him. “You are doing well though, baby. As their mother. You are doing great. You are holding down the fort for the both of us and I’m proud of you. Sydney tells me that you stepped up and you stepped in very well when they started mixing themselves up with the wrong crowd.” “They are my kids. I want what is...
NobantuWe have been invited to Gcina’s therapy session today. She is on a programme that is aimed at healing and helping her not try to kill herself again. I hear there was a session where Romeo was invited. Something about that pissed me off. Qaphela and I are paying for this programme cash. Now, we are paying for them to have a couple’s therapy? But isn’t it that I have to bite my tongue? Qaphela is treating me like I don’t love my...
KoenaThingo is lying on my chest and Mfundo is lying on my thigh. It is past midnight and we were meant to be watching movies while we wait up for Mthunzi to come home from work. He works until extremely late having to do his job and Tom’s job. I guess we all understand, but we miss having him around. I also just carry this panic in my heart every time he is not home. When I think about Lydia’s death, my...
Thomas“Semphete wena a ratehang.Mmoloki waka.Ha o ntse o sesa ba-a-bang,Semphete le nna.Jeso Jeso Ke a o rapela.Ha o ntse o sesa ba-a-bang,Semphete le nna.”I am staring at this tombstone and her picture on the funeral programme. It still has not registered to me that my wife is dead. Mrs Khalo almost fell into her grave when she had to go put sand on top of Lydia’s casket. I think she is losing her mind. Last night during the night vigil, she was literally...
"I made this for dad." Siya says as he shows me some drawing while I'm trying to dress him up for school. "It’s nice, fana." "Do you think he will like it?" "He will." "Mommy, how come he didn't raise me? Why did I have to be raised by Mbali's dad?" I'm quiet because never in a million years did I think that Siya would be calling Mthunzi "Mbali's dad." This is my fault. I thought I could have it all. Mthunzi is a good man. He raised Siya...
Luthando“Luthando, it is so late and you are sitting alone in the darkness. What’s wrong with you?” My mom walks into the TV room where I am sitting on a three-seater couch in my pyjamas, enjoying the silence and darkness of 2:30am. “Mama, I thought you were fast asleep.” “And I thought you were resting. You were complaining about a headache not too long ago.” “Yeah. But I can’t sleep a wink. My mind is all over the place.” “Let me make us some tea...
NobantuGcina has started school and there is so much peace in this house now that she is gone. She stays in res because I just know that if we got her place, Romeo would move in and their family house challenge would be resolved. That Romeo of hers has come and has paid damages for the pregnancy. I would have been okay if he never did come here because his family came in here prepared to pay lobola. I was so happy when Qaphela...
KoenaThis wedding is nice. The vibe is the one. Mthunzi and I are just not in the best of places right now. We are just very irritable with each other. Between Lydia's cousins who keep throwing themselves at him and him entertaining them and thinking it's funny, I'd rather not be here with him. Also, the bride and groom have been gone. They went to change outfits or something. We have eaten food and dessert already and there is still no...
